We in the west strive to impart our values and ethics to cultures around the world that in many if not all cases suffer from this....I spent a lot of time in countries where the old school traditional division between woman and man existed and it worked for them and has for millennia...who are we in the west to judge this? Pretty much any country where the west stuck it's nose into has big issues because we've changed their culture to such a point that it has gone toxic.
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If we look at my situation for instance...I retired and am now the "house husband" and have taught myself to conduct all home operations...I cook, clean, do laundry, wash windows, kill spiders, cut grass, shovel snow, maintain the vehicles, do the grocery shopping while my wife goes to work every day....
When she comes home, I have supper ready so in essence, I have assumed the role of the traditional wife used to have....and I have zero issues with that.
When my former colleagues visit and find out I have assumed this role they raise they are surprised and often mention that I went a long way from a dangerous and skilled operator to a house-bunny.....we always laugh at that and I of course threaten to put them through a wall.......
However, I'm not tied to the house, if I want to go somewhere or do something, I go and do no questions asked.
My wife's dad (rest his soul) was an old school man, his wife was expected to care for the home and when he had his dinner, she dished it up and when he was finished, she took the plate away....that was their way...and both of them looked very happy.
I will share a couple of examples as well. I was friends (still am with her) a couple where the wife was Japanese. He was Caucasian. He has now passed, she is now 84. I knew them/him for 8 years. She doted on him like he was a King. In that household he was. He didn't bark orders, she just knew his routine and kept him very cared for and he always showed her gratitude for it. And when I came to visit (we often had coffee together), that was extended to me.
He passed. I continued to visit her after his death. She relished the fact that I'd still take time to socialize with her. She would have my coffee ready, down to what brand of Cream did I prefer (I had no preference). She'd call and offer me home cooked meals. I'd accept. She moved away to be closer to her daughter. We keep in touch to this day. She calls sometimes just to say she misses making my coffee.
My next one married a Filipina. Named Carmen. He was stationed there and brought her home. They've been married for 40 years now. He openly joked with her, that all he wanted was his LBFM (Little Brown Fuc$ Machine). She giggles at that. Then he said he got the rest of the deal too. She dotes on him. He totally wants for nothing when she's around.
Eddie man you have it made.
Tom I totally love it. But it comes at a price. They take pride in serving their husband. And for that they expect complete loyalty. If I ever so much as look at another woman, it ends quickly and badly for the man.
And lastly, I had a Thai assembly tech in my Shuttle Team. Her name was Teea. Married to the Safety Director in the program. Teea was one of my best techs. Her weakness was her grasp of English. She couldn't read prints or tech specs. But once she knew what she was supposed to do, she was as good as it gets for quality consistent work.
Scott invited me over to a Super Bowl party. Me and about 8 others. Teea made sure we were all fed, and comfortable. All by herself. When she was caught up, she'd come and literally sit on the floor by his feet and relax between his legs.
It made me uncomfortable a bit. After it was over I got into a convo with him. Thanked him for the invite and said it made me a little uncomfortable. Scott you shouldn't have your wife sit at your feet awaiting your next request.
He chuckled at me.
Tom I have never ever once asked her to do that. When we first started getting serious, she asked me if it would be alright if she did. She hasn't been asked in 20 years of marriage to do it. For 20 years she wants to. For her it's like holding hands with your lover. She is proud to care for me. Sorry that makes you uncomfortable. Feel free to ask Teea, you have my permission.
So I did. Yes Mr Tom that is my element. Keeping a good house and a comfortable husband I like doing more than anything else.
As you pointed out Bee, who the eff are we to judge them. If there is mutual happiness, it's really nobody else's business.
