Need a male opinion

[Busa Jules]

I have dogs and I treat them better than some ppl treat children so I think I would be good at parenting... but then again, you can't leave a kid locked up in the house for a few hours while you go ride...

I have found the MAJOR downfall of having a 2 Busa household.... noone wants to stay behind while the other rides!!!

How much is a Nanny?? I could take on a 3rd job.....

 

[proud dad]

Thats it who wants to buy two kids?
I have a 6 yo girl and a 3 yo boy!
Currently the boy is climbing on me while I type this! Man is he heavy!

jk I love them too much to ever consider selling them now leasing is an option  

That means he wants ya to get on the floor and wrestle.

 

[Aquaman]

Having family to help out is really needed sometimes. My biggest gripe to my wife is that her parents dont take them enough...

 

[dadofthree]

My wife and I decided to have kids and I was neutral about it until my first born arrived. That's when I found out what love truly was.

I poured myself into my kids, didn't worry about my time or myself.

So when my first born went away to college five or so years ago, it changed the entire house for me. My wife was happy to get rid of him. They had issues because he was trying to become a young man, but the two of us had a great relationship.

It was a great experience for me. And I didn't expect it. My baby turned 18 last month.

 

[05BusaLe]

Thats it who wants to buy two kids?
I have a 6 yo girl and a 3 yo boy!
Currently the boy is climbing on me while I type this! Man is he heavy!

jk I love them too much to ever consider selling them now leasing is an option  

That means he wants ya to get on the floor and wrestle.

We are now playing in the dog house (big empty cardboard box) Ah the things that entertain them at this age!

 

[proud dad]

Thats it who wants to buy two kids?
I have a 6 yo girl and a 3 yo boy!
Currently the boy is climbing on me while I type this! Man is he heavy!

jk I love them too much to ever consider selling them now leasing is an option  

That means he wants ya to get on the floor and wrestle.

We are now playing in the dog house (big empty cardboard box) Ah the things that entertain them at this age!

little one's go nuts over big cardboard boxes.

 

[ThunderJohn]

Well I am still selfish. I love my kids to death but I love my alone time and my time alone with my wife. I know after I had kids I was like this is so much fun wish I had done it sooner. Don't sweat having a girl because that just means daddy's girl. I admit there is that oh man it is a girl though, but when you see the birth all those thoughts are completely gone. That is the most amazing thing I have ever witnessed in my life.

In fact we have two 12 and 6 me and my wife had had this same are we too selfish for another discussion. I am done I want to enjoy the time with the wife I love being young enough to play hard with my kids. I am 31 and I still jump on the trampoline dong flips go swimming have all the neatest toys. I am one of the only dad's that plays basket ball in the kids against dads game and actually dunks on the kids. I think you are just as old as you feel.

The main reason I do not think we will have anymore is because I want time with my wife and we are 12 years from being kid less. I would also have to get a reversal of my snip job, getting it was ok because it was less risky than my wife getting her end done. But to go under for something major down there uhhh kind of scary. My wife has her reasons mainly because she has worked hard to get her body back and loves the way she looks knowing it is harder to do it the older you get. She also recognizes the medical risk the older you get.

Like buying a Busa you always think about it and you know your going to end up with one. So just Go for it!!!!!!!

 

[Moparict]

I was 29 when my son was born. He was born on my birthday, so we share a special day. I was excited, scared, anxious, and a bunch of other emotions I don't recall now. Excited to have a son. Scared because I knew I would be responsible for a new life. I'm a single father now due to some poor decisions from the ex, but myself and my son are the best of friends. We are more than just family. I can't imagine what I would do without my boy. With all that being said, I have a life also. My son respects my life. I've taught him that many people are afraid to live. Death is inevitable, it's how you live that defines you. Now I just have to make sure I live the right example. That even in all of my sillyness, I do it right. As it stands now, my son will grow to be a good man, marry a good wife and have good kids. AND, he will probably ride a Hayabusa that is turbine powered!!

 

[Moparict]

Well I am still selfish. I love my kids to death but I love my alone time and my time alone with my wife. I know after I had kids I was like this is so much fun wish I had done it sooner. Don't sweat having a girl because that just means daddy's girl. I admit there is that oh man it is a girl though, but when you see the birth all those thoughts are completely gone. That is the most amazing thing I have ever witnessed in my life.

In fact we have two 12 and 6 me and my wife had had this same are we too selfish for another discussion. I am done I want to enjoy the time with the wife I love being young enough to play hard with my kids. I am 31 and I still jump on the trampoline dong flips go swimming have all the neatest toys. I am one of the only dad's that plays basket ball in the kids against dads game and actually dunks on the kids. I think you are just as old as you feel.

The main reason I do not think we will have anymore is because I want time with my wife and we are 12 years from being kid less. I would also have to get  a reversal of my snip job, getting it was ok because it was less risky than my wife getting her end done. But to go under for something major down there uhhh kind of scary. My wife has her reasons mainly because she has worked hard to get her body back and loves the way she looks knowing it is harder to do it the older you get. She also recognizes the medical risk the older you get.

Like buying a Busa you always think about it and you know your going to end up with one. So just Go for it!!!!!!!

The funniest thing I have witnessed was my "little" (6'5" 260lb) brother setting down at a table with his daughter wearing a pink feather boa and a hat having tea!! He is a good man for doing it, but I still give him grief about it.

 

[SnapAttack]

I gave up a lot. Stopped racing cars. Left my career as a LEO. Didn't sleep for a year. Freinds stopped asking me to go out. Made margarita's out of momma's milk by mistake. Poop stains on the floor and walls. Expenses increased. Life now cruised at a steady 100 mph. What did I get in return? Everything. At birth I saw his first breath. At 1 he walked for the first time. At 2 couldn't hear "twinkle twinkle little star" without melting. At 3 I walked him into day care on the first day and couldn't leave. At 4 he talked back to me for the first time. At 5 we started sharing our days activities. At 6 we shared my wife's second pregnancy. At 7 we shared his sister's birth. At 8 he was interested in airplanes so I booked a flight from San Antonio to Austin to have lunch. At 9 he told me for the first time he was proud to be my son. Each time I thought it couldn't get any better than this... and it does. No regrets. When I look back at all the sacrifices I made in order to be a responsible father and husband, I realize they wern't sacrifices at all.

 

[Aquaman]

Wait till the first time you put them in the "Tickle Trap" !!!!!

 

[big jim]

I have 2 kids. My daughter is 11 (lord please give me strength) and my son is 9. We had our daughter when I was only 23 and I was very scared and nervous. The first few months after she was born there was a great deal of adjusting to do but it was all worth it. My daughter is a "Daddys girl" and I would not change that for anything. We still do the daughter and daddy thing quite a bit and I love it, but I know that before long she is going to start wanting to do her own thing and not spend as much time with dad and this will probably be the hardest thing for me to get used to. I am lucky with my son he is really into the riding thing (both 4 wheelers and the Busa) so it is really easy for the 2 of us to spend time together.
Well I guess all that I had to say (before I decided to write a life story) is I would not change my wife and I having children at all. (MY .02)

 

[Busasweety]

Okay... as the resident girly girl.... I have to ask your opinion.

My husband and I have been married for almost 4 years now (and we are old...  31 and 37) and we have toyed with having children. We sometimes consider ourselves selfish for having all of our toys and I truly do not want to give them up. Just being pregnant for 9 months with no riding or racing is scary to me. But on the other hand, I always pictured having a youngin or two.

How did YOU feel when you found out you were going to be a dad? were you happy (always wanted a bambino),  upset (my life is over, it'll never be the same), neutral (like it's a girl thing.. she'll have to take care of it)?

And NO I AM NOT PREGNANT... just over analytical

I'm not able to offer a male opinion but I can speak to you as one girly girl to another and as a woman that has experanced the changes that DO take place for a female Rider once children do come into the picture....and then again once they have grown and went out on their own.  
I guess I'd have to ask how often do you get a chance to ride now......This in itself I think, is the second most important question when looking at the big picture....First of course is Do I want children? and Do I want them enough to except the sacrifices that come with that wonderful role?
Do Not kid yourself................YOURS Will be the life that endures the most sacrifices. Not said in anyway as a negitive towards your husband's roles.

Love the post subject, but I'm slightly confused to what you are looking for here....you're asking a males opinion but you made a strong statement in yout post about the 9 month carring thing and YOU not being able to ride and race any time you want.....maybe there are two subjects within the one...so if I'm off base here please forgive, otherwise PM me if you would like to hear more of the realities that we women riders do deal diffrently with then our male counter parts, when it comes to the whole "children" subject.

Goes without saying but here's to the Dads out there

 

 

Georgia

 

[Busa Jules]

I guess what I am asking.. plain and simple.. is "IS MY HUSBAND GONNA BE P***ED IF I GET PREGNANT" and will I have to give up MY whole life while he continues his like nothing has changed?

So I really am asking both the male and female opinion there....

Most of my friends already have teenagers and are almost done "parenting" and are hitting the roads.... me starting so late really alienates me from the MOMMY crowd of 20-somethings now.

 

[insane]

My wife and me married at 29, and at 32 we decided to have children. Well, something was wrong in her ovaries (or so the doctors said), and we struggled for 3 years with different fertility treatments, without success. Doctors told us to give up and take it easy, and in 2 months... bang-bang: 1 girl, and 1 year after, another. The most magic moment in all my life was watching the birth of my eldest. She didn't cried, just breathed and did a cute meaw-meaw noise.


Now I don't ride so often (other than my daily commute and ocasional sunday ride), and I am neglecting many other hobbies, but as they grow up, we discover more things to do together. I don't care playing less with my toys: every second with my daughters is priceless. Of course I have my "me alone" and "couple with no kids" time, but every day it becomes more and more fun just to be with them, talk with them, educate them. By now they are very responsible, good students, good girls, they love sports and reading, and are very funny and social. Until now it has been easy, but I know that as they enter teenagehood it will become harder, and they eventually will prefer to be on their own. That will be the hard part.

BTW, the blonde already recognizes the Kanji and when she sees it on the computer screen or in the flesh, she yells with me "HAYABUSAAAAA!!!"

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[Aquaman]

1st of all....he should not be pissed if you get pregnant, cause that means he is getting laid!!

You need to talk to him about it and express to him what it means to you to become a "Mother". If he has any compassion for you, he will understand. Becoming a parent is a major step up to the plate.
Dont worry about being the last of all your friends to have kids...I'm in that boat now and it doesn't matter a bit!
I think there should be no surprizes. He should want it as much as you.

We never wanted to know the sex of our kids, and we just kinda both knew exactly what they were....It was really weird. We were right about both f them.

 

[frisbee]

I couldn't have guessed from your name.  

Same here !

wWen I was your age I still wanted another Now that I'm older (45) My wife and I are glad the kids are all grown up . Of course you never are done raising them . As of today I would like to adopt an 6-8 year old , I don't want to be to old at the graduation. I think the big diff is that you do have to give up your time together because you have a little one there all the time . But You find other activities , things don't change in a bad way they just change ! Think on it hard its a lifelong comitment If you can borrow someones kid for a week . I'm sure someone out there will let you do it . We borrow my nefew one weekend a month he's 6 so he's at the age where you can do stuff .

 

[thrasherfox]

When your 6 year old child out of no where looks at you and says "I love you" that is one of the most special things in the world. You know it is true, your know it is from their heart, you know there is no hidden agenda. It is a feeling of love in its purist form.

There is also normally a mystical bond between parents and child which cannot be explained, it cannot be analyzed.. and it cannot be understood. it can only be experienced.. and once you experience it... then you understand.


I have learned soooo much about life, about myself, about love.. and all from my children... and in ways I never would have learned in any other way.

having kids bring out a dimension of a person, another part of the person, that can ONLY be brought out when having kids..

My kids are the most important part of my life (well in equality with my wife so I should say "FAMILY" )

And as others have said, when you have kids they have to come first, but the thing is them coming first is natural because it is something you WANT. so it all works out.

And it is not like you will NEVER have alone time. but from my experience even when I have had alone time, or the wife and I have gone somewhere with just us, we often start missing our kids so being without them often is not all that you would think it would be.

Let me also mention as reality that MOST people feel this way and MOST people experience this. but not all., so people do have kids and just don't feel it.

But you can never guess how you will feel, you will only know after you have kids. and after you have a child if neither of you feel like you are "into it" then there are LOTS of people who would like to have kids and cant and you can give the child up for adoption to someone who would want the child.

So I would say with the all the possibilities having one child could be a win win. if not for you and your hubby then for another couple who cannot have children

So if you decide to have children, brace for the ride of your life, but if you give then lots of love, lots of attention, proper direction and proper discipline (meaning spanking when needed, grounding when needed, and forgiveness with no punishment when needed) and involved in every aspect of their life as they are growing up.. it usually all works out well.


Good luck

 

[Aquaman]

And another thing that your husband should never not witness is the birth of his child.
This alone is one of the most unbelievable and greatest things a man can ever see before his own eyes.
I have yet to see anything greater. It brought instant tears of joy to my eyes with bothe deliveries. It's truly amazing!!!!

 

[nerfboy]

It always bugs me when people say - you're being selfish by not having kids.
Fact is the most selfish thing you can do is have children.
In this over populated world, with dire environmental issues, the worst thing to do is to breed.
Not to mention in the US, where so much of our tax dollars go to support children, you force others to pay for them.

As for personal enrichment. I have never met anyone with kids who would say having them was a mistake and always claiming it was the best thing ever. On the flip side I have never met anyone with kids that seemed all that happy or wasn't envious of my kid free life.

Don't get me wrong I love kids. I just love life more, and have no desire to waste it away breeding.

I am sure in this very pro breeder thread, my comments won't be taken well. But you ask for male views and all the responses are skewed to breeding. I "Ëœm just giving you mine. I am 40+ married and both of us are very happy we chose not to breed.