Single Parent Father Advice




gabusa

Donating Member
Registered
Well as most of you know I have just finished a 14 3/4 tour in Iraq. Well now I'm heading back to Germany to finish my time there and well my my 2 y/o daughter will be joining me there also. This is a challenge that I so welcome.

Being the oldest of 6 I have to sit back and say wow. I have spent more than half of my daughters life in Iraq and to have seen her grow over the internet has been amazing.

What advice do you fathers have for me? Single mothers advice is okay also. Just the basics: I'm 36 y/o, been in the Army almost 19 years and I just completed my 6th deployment. I have never been a single parent before.
 

rolandag2

Registered
all i can say is hold her and tell and show her that you love her and give her lots of hugs and kisses. i have 2 boys but do the same everytime i get a chance cus noone is promised tomorrow so take advantage of it and talk to her bout god


im prior military us army 54b thank you for everything u r doing overthere be safe and take care:bowdown:
 

dadofthree

Seasoned Beef
Donating Member
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Unfortunately kids don't come with manuals. Given your background you should be just fine. I haven't met a Father yet that couldn't help but love his daughter ( I'm sure there's many examples out there, but I'm talking normal fellas )

Spend every spare moment you have with her because as she gets older she will grow away from you and you won't be as cool as you are now. You can't back that clock up.

Best of luck and thanks for your service. :thumbsup:
 

Dino

VERITAS - AEQUITAS
Donating Member
Registered
Utilize the resources the military provides. Look into day care early and if there is a wait list get on it as soon as possible. If you can affored it maybe find a nanny.
Get you family care plan in order and keep it updated.

No sugar coating it will be very rewarding but very hard to balance being a single parent and a soldier.
 

GSXTacy

Mr. January
Donating Member
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Just remember, they have a routine that hasnt included you. You are not in charge, you do not come in and start issuing orders. Just hang back and enjoy getting to know your child and SLOWLY take on responsibilites around the house. My daughter was 14 months old when I came home from Desert Storm and almost the same from my son when I returned from Somalia.
 

Laylas_Mom

Registered
Just make her feel like she is a priority. The time you spend will be remembered far longer than the $$ you spent. I have done it alone since I was 7 months pg. My daughter is a pretty awesome 12yr old now. I am sure we all would be more than happy to answer any questions you may have... Good luck Daddy...:beerchug:
 

Takeuon

Registered
As a single Father of a 5yr old lil Princess and from a military family. My only advice would be to monitor your loving interaction with her. What I mean by this is...your life of the last 19yrs has been very structured. Not to mention I'm sure you witnessed some hard things the last two years. You are most likely set in your ways and are used to doing daily activities in a certain manner.
Your beautiful daughter of two is at the opposite end of the spectrum. She is a free spirit and is going to be for some time. This may be a bit difficult transition for you.
One thing that will not be difficult is to show how much you love each other. And I know you'll do a fine job at that. Enjoy your time with her. Welcome home soldier!
 

Schism

Donating Member
Registered
my tactic is to speak to them like you would anyone else and not like a baby, read books several times a day, teach her numbers, and do some good interactive play with her. take her to your local park for the breather and to scope out the lovely moms that like to talk. you've got some catchin' up to do with her so enjoy all of it. :beerchug:
 

skydivr

Jumps from perfectly good Airplanes
Donating Member
LOVE HER (the easy part), and BE VERY PATIENT (the hard part). Thank you for your service soldier!
 

GSXcite

Squirrel Master
Donating Member
Registered
Just remember, they have a routine that hasnt included you. You are not in charge, you do not come in and start issuing orders. Just hang back and enjoy getting to know your child and SLOWLY take on responsibilites around the house. My daughter was 14 months old when I came home from Desert Storm and almost the same from my son when I returned from Somalia.
And my son, GSXTacy was born while I was in Viet Nam. Didn't get to see him untill he was almost a year old. Somehow kids, even that young, will warm up to their dad right away. Thanks for your service. Get some much needed rest and enjoy the time with your child.:bowdown:
 

Katslair

Registered
God Bless you, GABUSA! For the sacrifices that you have made, I am truly honored and humble. May you and your daughter grow in your relationship together. Treat her as you would treat your greatest treasure. Love her, respect her, allow her to be her own little person, and she will grow up to be a fine young lady. Live, Laugh, Love . . .
 

Aggie12

Registered
i don't know about being a father but one thing i wish my father would do is just talk with me and be my friend. i guess just take her everywhere with you tell her everyday how beautiful she is and how much you love her give her a hug every night before she falls asleep. just let her know that don't matter what you'll be their for her. congratulations on the daughter i hope things will work out yall will be in my prayers. :beerchug:
 

Fastfrog007

Donating Member
Registered
LOVE HER (the easy part), and BE VERY PATIENT (the hard part). Thank you for your service soldier!
+1 Be Patient, last year my girlfriend and i started dating, she came with her sister and her 2 yr. old nephew that live with her. Im not good with kids, or at least i wasnt. I was patient with him and it kinda came to me. It will come to you too:thumbsup:
 

Spectre

Donating Member
Registered
little girls will/can OWN their daddy. i'm fairly strict with my daughter and we still have loads of good times. i have simple rules (admittedly a lot of rules since she's 7), but have told her that they will lessen as she gets older and "already knows these". :D

it's amazing what you will find yourself adjusting to with a daughter. most likely i would not be as permissive with a son. i treat my little girl with respect and we play, paint, draw, color, fly kites, whatever... but she also knows when she has to pay attention and behave like 'a good little girl'.

it might sound like i'm too strict on her, but that's not the case. she knows her bounds and what i expect from her. it's made our time together SO much easier.

you will figure out how to deal with your little girl's personality soon enough. enjoy your experience because they grow up far too fast.

also, be aware that she will one day (probably) pick a husband that is the closest thing to her (perceived) daddy.

so what kind of man do you want your daughter dating/marrying? ???

the fact that you are asking yourself (and others') how to handle the situation is actually a good thing. i'm sure that you will be more than fine. taking care of your child is literally second nature.
 

boazalmighty

Purple Rain - Dino
Donating Member
Registered
Unfortunately kids don't come with manuals. Given your background you should be just fine. I haven't met a Father yet that couldn't help but love his daughter ( I'm sure there's many examples out there, but I'm talking normal fellas )

Spend every spare moment you have with her because as she gets older she will grow away from you and you won't be as cool as you are now. You can't back that clock up.

Best of luck and thanks for your service. :thumbsup:
ya i wish mine came with a manual, i'd smack him with it...:laugh:

other than that, good advice:beerchug:
 



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