Single topic debate #12

[heavybusa]

Great thread Projekt, I couldnt agree more with the thoughts above.

I had it tough, my dad definetly has some anger, drug, and alcohol issues.

And as everyone else stated as I got older it got worse, that relationship is shot now.

I often find myself thinking of physical discipline but realize that my first reaction is out of anger.

With that being said I cannot stand disrespectful kids and if they do not get it when they are young they will get it when they grow up!

[unkleslapnutz]

(Projekt @ Sep. 07 2006,03) Great story their Unkle...
Where in Yugoslavia are your family roots from.. I live in Sarajevo... Been here for a couple-three years...
Jose

To tell you the truth I dont know what the names of the two towns my father bounced between. Heck I dont know if they still exsist. I will have to ask him and get back with you.

[riironman]

My oldest daughter is 13 and i tell her all the time " You roll your eyes at me one more time ..I will roll your head off your shoulders. I think i should of spanked her more. I think i spoiled all my kids and now they are all brats. And i feel they are too old too spank. But i guess 5 across the eyes wont hurt once in a while.

[Tree]

No kids here, but here is my $.02

Spanking is good when necessary. Most parents know when this is, but there are all ways a few that don't. Wooden spoons, yep (to the but). Had sore knuckles more than once from blocking them. Some kids just need their buts stomped, or maybe it's the parents that need an a$$ woopin. There is nothing that I hate worse than "no, no" and "1, 2, 3". If you have to tell them more than once, you are not doing your job as a parent.

Later,

Steve

[Tree]

A little background from above. My father was a POS. I nearly killed him on 3 different occasions. At the time it seemed like the right thing to do. I won't go into the first two, but the last time, he squared off with me in front of the house. I was no longer 16 and 98# soaking wet. (Two years in the after I joined the Army - Infantry.) I simply asked him if this is what he really wanted, because this would be the last time he would ever be capable of doing it. He died 2 years ago on Veterns Day. I can honestly say I don't miss him at all. Kids don't respect a$$holes, and they know the difference.

Later,

Steve

[MPH 200]

Beat them like a red headed stepchild - Oh Yeah, I have a red headed stepchild - 12 yray old boy.
So far only once - He is convinced we will kill him & hide the body. 6 year old daughter will be a lot more trouble in a few years.

[delboy]

Kids don't respect a$$holes, and they know the difference.[/Quote]

Total agreement Steve

[Over_Easy]

(VaBusa @ Sep. 01 2006,07:03) There's a huge difference between hitting your child and spanking your child...

I was spanked as a kid for not behaving...my kids get spankings when enough is enough and that's what makes them understand...I've been around too many parents that not only refuse to spank but also don't like the idea of telling their children "no" and those kids are a nightmare to be around...

Please talk to my brother and sister in-law. My brother would prefer to spank and say no to my 2 year old nephew, but she would freak if he ever spanked him.

When she says no it's so passive it makes me laugh. Stop that, that's not nice. He then cries and she gives him a friggin' cookie.

Kid will be spoiled. When he gets older and I'm watching him I'm going to tell him what's what. Hopefully when he's older and not viewed as this cute little play thing my brother will lay down the law with a little more discipline.

[thrasherfox]

Guess I will add this.

My nephew who was 8 at that time stole $20.00 from my son from my house.

My sister inlaw found the money on him at their home and he confessed to taking it from my oldest son.


This was over a weekend. Well they were supposed to have brought the 20 over to give it back to my son.

While I would have taken my son right then and there, on the spot to take the money back, they waited until they had time.

Friday rolls around and I find out that they never took the 20 from him, they left it in his possesion to return it. He goes to school and buys $20.00 worth of candy.

So I am getting a little irriated because this is the not the way I would have handled it nor was it the way I felt it SHOULD have been handled.

So a few days later my sister in law brings $20.00 over and gives it to my son and that was the end of it.

So I am still thinking my nephew really didnt get a clue, so the following week my sister in-law comes over and brings my nephew by for a visit. as soon as she walks in the door with him and look at her and I tell her

"I need to do something and you are probably not going to be happy about it"

And she tells me to go ahead.

So I calmly call my nephew over, he stands in front of me and I get down on one knee and grab his shirt and scrunch it up to where it is almost choking him and I bring him to about 4 inches from my face and I tell him in a very calm but firm voice:

"you ever steal ANYTHING from my house, from me, from your aunt or from my sons again I will beat your butt myself and you wont be able to sit for weeks"

The kid was so scared he started balling I asked him if he understood and he said yes.

I then gave him a hug and I told him I loved him but I could not tolerate that behavior.

Have never had a problem with him since. and I am usually one of the relatives he runs to and hugs as soon as he sees me.

He knows I love him, but he also knows he cant screw with me that I wont take his crap.

As matter of fact sometimes when he gets out of line at home his mother and his step dad will threaten to call me if he doesnt straighten out lol

[Over_Easy]

(thrasherfox @ Sep. 07 2006,10:42) As matter of fact sometimes when he gets out of line at home his mother and his step dad will threaten to call me if he doesnt straighten out lol

Looks like you need to pull the same stunt on his parents as well.

[thrasherfox]

(Over_Easy @ Sep. 07 2006,10:51)

(thrasherfox @ Sep. 07 2006,10:42) As matter of fact sometimes when he gets out of line at home his mother and his step dad will threaten to call me if he doesnt straighten out lol

Looks like you need to pull the same stunt on his parents as well.

lol.. we wont even go down that road.. but yeah..

[VaBusa]

(Over_Easy @ Sep. 07 2006,12:55)

(VaBusa @ Sep. 01 2006,07:03) There's a huge difference between hitting your child and spanking your child...

I was spanked as a kid for not behaving...my kids get spankings when enough is enough and that's what makes them understand...I've been around too many parents that not only refuse to spank but also don't like the idea of telling their children "no" and those kids are a nightmare to be around...

Please talk to my brother and sister in-law.  My brother would prefer to spank and say no to my 2 year old nephew, but she would freak if he ever spanked him.

When she says no it's so passive it makes me laugh.  Stop that, that's not nice.  He then cries and she gives him a friggin' cookie.

Kid will be spoiled.  When he gets older and I'm watching him I'm going to tell him what's what.  Hopefully when he's older and not viewed as this cute little play thing my brother will lay down the law with a little more discipline.

I've been around far too many kids that were never taught what "no" really means and I can't imagine that system of thought really ever helping them in real life...

It's a shame your brother's going through that...I feel it will only add to a child's frustration later in life when "no" is a fact of life, a part of every day...picture that child all grown up, throwing himself on the floor because he didn't get a raise

[Shanling]

Great posts here folks. I agree with most of them too!

I am sitting here just outside of NYC in a hotel room on a business trip and missing my kids like crazy now! This is my weekend with them and I can't wait to fly home tomorrow and pick them up!

I am a Baptist. You can bet your sweet <u know what> that I will spank one of my kids if they need it! I will also praise them when they do right!

[KRUZIN]

Just my opinion. I wish the law makers would step back and take just one look and do some research on juvenile crime records, they would probably find out that before they passed the law that prohibited parents from spanking their kids and the school pricipal from spanking your kid for getting in trouble in school that there are probably less juvenile records or crimes prior to this ignorant law. The big problem with this law and how kids are behaving nowdays is they know you can't touch them or you will go to jail or anyone else. That is why they don't respect anyone.

[Projekt]

True that... I was in school during the early 80's when the principal was still allowed to paddle. One or two of my peers managed to experience that particular type of discipline ONCE before they just straightened up. They outlawed corporal punishment soon thereafter but didn't really publicize it... They should make it a possibility now all the way through high school to make up for lost time.. I think that humiliation would work better for teens though.

[rlachermeier]

Been on both ends of the spanking thing and think there is a time, way, and place for it.

The time is only when it is needed.
The way is with love not hate.
And the place is not in public.

With the kids being 22 and 26 now the only one who gets spanked in our house is my wife and that's only after I have her permission.