worst, dumbist, craziest thing thats happened

[boosted]

Just read another post about having a bad day and I decided to start a thread on others experiences. Come on fellows spit it out, wee've all done or experienced some crazy @%$!*&^! I'll start. The year is 1983. One day comming back from Clemson University while I was in school, a built trans am pulled up beside me on the interstate. He started to jerk his car, motion with his hand etc. wanting to race. The bike I was riding at the time was a GS1100es.{fastest bike in it's day} Well I had a big duffle bag strapped to the back full of dirty clothes. Contrary to my parents warnings about doing any "racing" I decided to smoke this idiot and proceeded to do so. Unfortunately at about 130 or so my duffle bag flipped up under my fender and rear wheel. Complete lockdown of rear wheel,

fish tailing all over the interstate, my rear tire popped but I finally came to a stop.{REAR ONLY BREAKING DOES NOT STOP A MOTORCYCLE} I thought my chain or trany had locked up but when I dismounted the bike and saw what had happened I had to laugh about almost shitting in my pants. Needless to say Dad was angry as hell all the way home with my bike in the back of his truck. Actually I'm very lucky I didn't lose my life in that incident.

 

[ibified]

Wow,

Another fellow Clemson Alum here. who'd have think it?!?!?!?


I have yet to do anything TOO stupid on a bike, but yeah, ive done my share in cars before. I came into an off ramp from the highway WAY too hot once in Spartanburg SC...slid right off the road, did 2 complete 360s, and wound up bouncing back onto the on ramp.

Sometimes God smiles on idiots. he did for me that day.

 

[redvoodoo]

When I was about 21, I had my dirtbike in the back of my pickup. Thought it would be cool to ride it out of the back of the truck. I didn't take into account the fact that a dirt tire just spins in the bed of a pickup. Instead of a slight wheelie and landing on my back tire, I spun and nose dived at about 2mph. Right over the handlebars. Lucky for me the neighbors were outside and got to witness the whole thing.

 

[dewie]

I have in general bad luck, like my truck starting on fire, brand new furnace crapping out on the coldest day of the year on Christmas so I have to pay a plumber double time so he can fix it. And thats in the past two weeks. But on the street bikes I've been good. Dirt bikes I wasen't to bad, many spills. But one thing comes to mind, when I was a kid I was out on my 125cc and I was coming up on a little rider on a 50cc. I was a ways behind him, he had a speed wobble and terfed it on the only piece of pavement out there. I got up to him and his handlebars broke off in his hands and the only thing he did was twist the throttle more!! Poor little dude, he couldn't even say he had a tank slapper cause the bars couldn't slap the tank!!

 

[boosted]

KEEP THEM COMING GUYS, THIS SHOULD BE A FUNNY THREAD.

 

[Churchkey]

Around 1977 the red head I had just started dating a few weeks eariler shows up at my  shop & hangs out. I roll the neglected Dunstall out of the corner & ask her to wash & wax it. She works on it for about 5 hours & gets it standing tall. I need to run up to the parts store for a small item so I jump on it & head out on the 4 lane without ANY gear, just going a mile or so down the road. Running well over the limit the traffic light for the intersecting 4 lane goes red for me. NO problem, 2 fingers on the front brake lever will set the Dunstall twin discs to work & I will stop in plenty of time. I have NO FRONT BRAKES!!. Lever is hard, I put a death grip on it & nothing, working the rear brake hard & skidding the tail around I look for a place to bail off. Nothing but cement curbs & sidewalk. I figure I'll lock up the rear & put her down & slide on my ass with the bike in front of me to act as a buffer when I hit cross traffic. Just when I lock up the rear the front brake comes in & locks up the front wheel. The bike stays up & I end up on the tank & my boys are getting real friendly with the gas cap. I'm on my tip toes trying to balance the bike & slide back off the tank when a pick up truck pulls up along side. The guy says "man, your going to hurt yourself riding like that". I tried to talk but all that came out was this squeeky falsetto voice that said "I'm going to kill that B**ch when I get back to the shop". Damn woman waxed the brake rotors.

Back at the shop I'm screaming at her for almost killing me. All she said was "I don't know anything about brake rotors" & turned & walked away.

I married her, we are still together but now the only way she will touch a bike is with her ass on the seat.

 

[stlbusarider]

nice one

 

[busa crazy]

myrtle beach in 2001 my friends talked me into riding back to n.c. without a helmet , that lasted for awhile . we was on hwy 501 getting ready to pass a couple of cars like usual , about the time i pulled into the other lane to pass the car, they ran over a foodlion bag and it preceed to go completely around my head. i couldn't get it off my head fast enough , i hate to say it but i almost shat on myself.how i didn't die i dont know , but i finally got it tore lose so i could see , pulled over and put my damn helmet.

i got one more and im gone. my wife kept telling me to secure my bike in the shop at night so it would be hard to steal. well i went and bought one of those rear brake locks that they sell at the motorcycle shop. i woke up late for 3rd shift went to the shop started my bike and took off , to find out my wife had put the lock on my bike , because she thought i forgot to put it on. there i am with the back brakes destroyed and fluid every where.
bike had about 200 miles at the time and i had to replace the brakes

 

[SAMBUSA]

Had a sweat shirt fall down off the bike and into the chain while doing a little over 90. Back tire locked up and I slid for about a 1/4 mile. Didn't blow the tire so I rode it slowly home, then blew the tire when I got there.



Bought a trailer for the bike in early 07. I just got the bike back from paint and was gettin ready to go to Gatlinburg. We decided to trailer the bike down as there was still snow on the ground here. While I was getting the trailer loaded up, I lifted the gate to close it up. Didn't realize that there wasn't a stop for gate till after I let go of it and it fell forward and landed on the tail section of the Busa. I started crying, seriously. We still made the trip though

 

[Mr Bogus]

about 1976 in Pueblo West CO I am working on my CT3 Yamaha 175 enduro fixing the fuel lines...

I am struggling trying to see as it is getting dark...

SO... my little brother brought me out some more light... (a lit candle)

WELL... I saw the thing and then the vapor trail ignite running all the way to the bike fuel tank...

needless to say, it was not a pretty sight..

 

[mymaster]

Most intelligent thing I've done with the bike back in 05 when I first got it was pull into the driveway late one night and park it without putting the kickstand out

I also put my stubby little right leg out to catch my balance on a right hand down hill slope at a stop, bikes just don't look good when their all the way horizontal.

Not bike related but I had a guy I worked with from England - fill one fuel tank up with diesel on a gasoline powered two-tank work truck, well here I am driving down the freeway and I run the tank with gas in it dry and I switch over to the other tank - MAN! Worst sounding engine I had ever heard and was putting out the thickest whitest smoke I had ever seen.

 

[CanadienMike]

1980 something. How cool I thought I was, riding my CB750 accross the college's nice unkempt green lawn as the sun was shinning and the girls were staring. All too short were my moments of glory, as my front wheel made contact with the grassy hidden street curb which caused me to gracefully dive up, over my handlebars and pirouette onto the firm asphalt of the public street. My friends gave me a mark of 9.9

Mike B

 

[redvoodoo]

Back in the early 80s a couple of buddies and I were riding dirt bikes outside of town on some heavily wooded dirt roads. I was riding a new yamaha IT 175. My buddy had the same bike. We were running flat out in top gear and hit a corner. My buddy pushed me off the road and away I went. The shoulder dropped about 15 feet down to a swamp. I somehow missed every tree and there were alot of them, and sailed through the air, landing in a mucky pond. Not a scratch on me or bike. To this day I can[t believe I missed every tree on my decent.

 

[99'busa]

When I was about 21, I had my dirtbike in the back of my pickup.  Thought it would be cool to ride it out of the back of the truck.  I didn't take into account the fact that a dirt tire just spins in the bed of a pickup.   Instead of a slight wheelie and landing on my back tire, I spun and nose dived at about 2mph.  Right over the handlebars.   Lucky for me the neighbors were outside and got to witness the whole thing.

im sorry thats funny right there i dont care who you are

 

[Revvv]

I was riding a CBR900RR down the driveway of my in-laws when I noticed a snake on the concrete. I pulled to the edge and nudged the bike forward to get a better look. The problem with my snake watching was that I was more enterested in the snake than I was in where my bike was. I put my foot down and never touched the ground. The bike was too close to the edge of the concrete and I got to see the snake up close and personal.

None of this would have been funny if my entire family had not have been outside to laugh at me.

Oh, the snake was a pigmy rattler. Thanks to my brother in law for the rescue. That little guy coiled into a striking position when I hit the ground. There was no way I was getting out from under the bike.

 

[onedownfiveup]

I didn't stop when I saw red/blue lights...once. Oh wait, I'm just kidding.

 

[BlkDrgnZ28]

I've got two because well... im just that much of a genious i was 14 and i lived at my dads house during the summers up in illinois and he had this lil pos kawi that i could ride and it was one that if you got it rolling fast enough in first gear and dumped the clutch it would start well i decided to sneak out of my dads house and he had a really steep hill for a driveway well i had cleaned the bike up earlyer to have it nice looking when i snuck out so i rolled it out of the house and got down to the end of the road to dump the clutch so i could start it without waking him up and when i let the clutch out all i heard was just that high rev scream from it and next thing i know the bike shot right across the neighbors yard into their tree so as i hit the ground i feel something else im being stung by hornets all over i disturbed a nest and they where attacking me while the bike was running wide open with the exhaust laying flat on my thigh the next thing i know my dad came across the street picked the bike up off of me beat the crap out of me, when i was cleaning the bike i snapped the throttle cord with it being stuck in wide open throttle i still have a nice burn from the pipe on my leg ohh and by the way im allergic to hornets so it was a wonderfull night i spent in the er with my dad ready to kill me

the other one was 4 years ago i had a bought a 1988 vw cabrio convertable for 400 dollars it was blue with a red hood, blue ducktape roof, a hole in the muffler the size of a football so it sounded like a tractor it was truly a beast ohh the greates part was the odometer was broken at 880k miles and it sounded like a popcorn maker when you took corners, well me and one of my buddies were driving to one of my friends house on the fourth of july and were goin through this fancy neighborhood and i see this big pile of yard trimmings and sticks so i decided to ram it ... always great and we made a yard trimmings bomb go everywhere laughed and got to my friends house my car was still running and i got out to talk to another one of my friends at their truck and smoke started to come out of my hood so i went ot turn my car off cause i didn't really care i wasn't driving anywhere else that night and we went into his garage and next thing i saw a light coming up the drivway i turned around thinking someone else was pulling up and theres flames coming out the hood of my car ... absolutely amazing and breathtakingly funny so we grab his fire extingusher put it out with that and a hose and pop the hood to see what happened and the twigs i hit broke the fuel line loose spilling gas on my exhaust manifold were the stick was sitting which was dry and caught on fire so we laughed and my buddie pudge was shooting off bottle rockets and one hit the car again only this time it all went up it was a giant ball of fury that would go out for about 20 minutes ... yet agian im just that special

 

[Aquaman]

I just did it the other day, but it was soo dumb, I'm not telling.... I cant

 

[SAMBUSA]

I just did it the other day, but it was soo dumb, I'm not telling.... I cant

Sheep bite??

 

[Revvv]

I've got two because well... im just that much of a genious i was 14 and i lived at my dads house during the summers up in illinois and he had this lil pos kawi that i could ride and it was one that if you got it rolling fast enough in first gear and dumped the clutch it would start well i decided to sneak out of my dads house and he had a really steep hill for a driveway well i had cleaned the bike up earlyer to have it nice looking when i snuck out so i rolled it out of the house and got down to the end of the road to dump the clutch so i could start it without waking him up and when i let the clutch out all i heard was just that high rev scream from it and next thing i know the bike shot right across the neighbors yard into their tree so as i hit the ground i feel something else im being stung by hornets all over i disturbed a nest and they where attacking me while the bike was running wide open with the exhaust laying flat on my thigh the next thing i know my dad came across the street picked the bike up off of me beat the crap out of me, when i was cleaning the bike i snapped the throttle cord with it being stuck in wide open throttle i still have a nice burn from the pipe on my leg ohh and by the way im allergic to hornets so it was a wonderfull night i spent in the er with my dad ready to kill me

the other one was 4 years ago i had a bought a 1988 vw cabrio convertable for 400 dollars it was blue with a red hood, blue ducktape roof, a hole in the muffler the size of a football so it sounded like a tractor it was truly a beast ohh the greates part was the odometer was broken at 880k miles and it sounded like a popcorn maker when you took corners, well me and one of my buddies were driving to one of my friends house on the fourth of july and were goin through this fancy neighborhood and i see this big pile of yard trimmings and sticks so i decided to ram it ... always great and we made a yard trimmings bomb go everywhere laughed and got to my friends house my car was still running and i got out to talk to another one of my friends at their truck and smoke started to come out of my hood so i went ot turn my car off cause i didn't really care i wasn't driving anywhere else that night and we went into his garage and next thing i saw a light coming up the drivway i turned around thinking someone else was pulling up and theres flames coming out the hood of my car ... absolutely amazing and breathtakingly funny so we grab his fire extingusher put it out with that and a hose and pop the hood to see what happened and the twigs i hit broke the fuel line loose spilling gas on my exhaust manifold were the stick was sitting which was dry and caught on fire so we laughed and my buddie pudge was shooting off bottle rockets and one hit the car again only this time it all went up it was a giant ball of fury that would go out for about 20 minutes ... yet agian im just that special

The craziest thing I have done today is read this post with no punctuation.