Ordered my leathers today...

Dear captain

If you can fit into an Alpinestars jacket and pants, you're not that big. I'm six feet tall and weigh 265 pounds, which means the only Alpinestars gear I can wear are gloves and boots!

Honestly I'm just praying that I dont look like "that guy" you all know who I'm talking about... you know the guy on the beach in the speedo!!!! I dont want to look like like a big piece of cowhide riding down the street or track....

I refuse to ask anyone of they make my butt look big <span style='font-size:17pt;line-height:100%'>OZZY !!!</span>   has it been a year already?
hmmmm Ozzy? same Ozzy that had to replace his pants? (the ones I have now?) hmmmmm I sense a trend here...
Cool Cap!

I need to have mine let out a bit in the arms, strange I know but true.

You know they say black is slimming!
Hey Boaz when we were getting our room on the phone Reba was wanting to know if you had new leathers this year... She said last year jeans were great but she's hoping you have a little leatherware this time.... She mentioned something about cheeckless leathers or something.......

Why do I have visions of another leather removal escapade in my trailer again"¦..
OH"¦. My-O-MY"¦. I can't get the image out of my head.