Child Support Question

[Skywalker]

OK, I'm now divorced and received my 1st child support payment today and my lawyer is already gone home and is pretty much done with us anyways. He done the divorce and anything else he will want money for. So, here is my question for those of you that have been divorced. I won full custody of my children and one is 16 and the other will be 18 Feb 26 2011. Divorce was final 30 Nov 2010. Initially my lawer didn't even list my oldest as he/we new that it would only be about 90 days of coverage for my oldest son till he reaches 18 year of age. However, I told him that 90 days is 90 days and he deserves his child support just as much as little brother. Even out initial paperwork had child support outlined for my youngest at 472.00 based off her pay. So it was after that and before court hearing that I ask my lawyer to add the elder son and he did. So, I would assume since the court said child support awarded to me as sole provider in the amount of 472.00 and list both children that the price would be doubled? That is my question as she send payment for 472.00 and I expected it to be twice that. What is the norm for this type of issue if you have anyone that has done this. Comments plz.

 

[PandaNin]

If court order says $472.00; it's $472.00. They have to specify the total amount. Sorry but your attorney screwed up.

 

[Tufbusa]

Your divorce paper is a contract. Read them carefully as you are entitled to exactly what the settlement states. If it states two children and she is required to pay $472 per month then keep your lip buttoned and don't stir the pot.

If you do stir the pot you may very well have that amount reduced to $236 when the oldest child reaches 18 in a couple months. Don't stir the pot and end up getting short changed because she may not recognize she can cut the payment in half when the kid turns 18.

 

[Black Sheep]

Sorry to hear about the divorce. Try not to do that again.

I've had a few....too many that is.

 

[ResidentEvil]

I got 2 years left to pay in the CS Club of America

 

[nursebusa]

well here in mo it goes like this if they turning 18 but is still in school they still have to pay but if they are not in school then it stop at 18. i have friends both have 2 kids like you but she get double while he dont to me that not right but again it seem like the system is not set up for single men with full custody of there children

 

[Blanca BusaLess]

It would have to clearly say $472 per child.
If it doesn't you could have ten kids and your still only gonna get $472.

 

[Skywalker]

All good input. I think after talking to a personal friend tonight that its based off of her income and it will be 472.00. So, I didn't intent to push any buttons and pay a penny anyways for it would end 26 Feb 11. It better not drop in 1/2 of that in Feb or my Damn Lawyer will have to put me in jail. POS Thanks guys... divorce was good as I filed and she left with a small U Haul trailer and that was it. Good to go if the 472.00 stayes at 472.00. I do know she is working two jobs now and will report her W2 to me and maybe I can raise it. Also, kids will go to collage and I have head that as well will constatute child support while in collage. Kept my Busa!

 

[skydivr]

This may be a little blunt, but - This isn't about you, this is about your kids. Not anger, not vengance, but your kids. The money is for your expense to raise THEM.

Most of these situations are reversed. How many times have I heard "I'm working two jobs and I'm dirt poor and my wife is taking me for all I've got in child support and living like a queen"? Two wrongs don't make a right. This isn't about how much money you can squeeze from her. Make sure it goes for THEM; keep good records so you can't be accused later of wasting it on yourself - that can come back to haunt you.

If I were a single parent with two children I'm raising alone, I'm not so sure I could keep riding.

It's a shame for them no matter what; I wish you the best of luck.

 

[Takeuon]

By the time you got a court date to ammend the order and add your eldest son...he'll already be 18. Not to mention you'll have to pay more $$$ to the bloodsucking lawyer.

Deal with it as best you can & move on. Divorce and custody battles suck no matter what the outcome! Trust me....sadly I know.

 

[Slowboy]

I wish i could have got off good as she did!!! cause i'm paying 9 a month for my 2 kids!! And i know one of the mothers is not doin right with the money at all.. but that will change real soon cause lawyer is about to ask the judge for her to start showing what she is spending the money on!! So now she will have to show proof each month

 

[twotonevert]

Not much I can say except you dont have it that bad. It could always be worse.

 

[Skywalker]

Yep, sounds a little blunt. It for sure isnt' about me and at 50 years old and 21 years at 100 percent faithful I'm fully aware of who it's about... my children. I have my 1st check book for the 1st time in my life as I gave it all to her and walked around with a 20 spot in my pocket as I served and traveled all over the world. She was not faithful and i cut their cords/bathed/changed diapers/feed/middle of the night feedings and took them everywhere and still continue to be the best father. Simply put, no squeezing from me at all but trying to understand what should be as if it was reversed it would be squeezed from me at about four times the amount and I'm even totally disabled. The want for nothing and it's not because of her money as I have made 90 percent of it over the last 21 years and they say thank you, yes sir, yes ma'am and have never worn wore out close and appreciate all they have as i have inbedded that into them just like it was imbedded into me. No anger at all as I pray daily and have let it go as that is why I filed. Without her money of a single penny I will raise and continue as I have for nearly 18 years and will put them through collage as well. I don't work two jobs as I'm not allowed to work at all. But I have worked a real job and paid taxes since I was 16 and worked for cash as a child before then. Not sure about the two wrongs but real sure about the one wrong that broke her vows and I never did and say that with all honesty. There savings account I have opened already has enough for their 1st major down payment on their 1st homes when they finish collage is proof it will go to them. Anyone that knows me knows I spend for my kids and they are well took care of. Hope i didn't sound to harsh myself but this is not a vengance thing... just trying to understand what is it supposed to be, nothing more! riding my busa... just a statement to let the Org know... I still have a Busa and glad that I do and not at all spitfull and the money I paid her out of pocket she will be in good shape for a long time not to mention the 900.00 plus per month for the rest of her life. She is good to go.

This may be a little blunt, but - This isn't about you, this is about your kids. Not anger, not vengance, but your kids. The money is for your expense to raise THEM.

Most of these situations are reversed. How many times have I heard "I'm working two jobs and I'm dirt poor and my wife is taking me for all I've got in child support and living like a queen"? Two wrongs don't make a right. This isn't about how much money you can squeeze from her. Make sure it goes for THEM; keep good records so you can't be accused later of wasting it on yourself - that can come back to haunt you.

If I were a single parent with two children I'm raising alone, I'm not so sure I could keep riding.

It's a shame for them no matter what; I wish you the best of luck.

 

[Skywalker]

Your right and there is no way I would spend a penny on a lawyer for this but if I confirmed this was to be doubled I would hit her with it.... she would either do it or not and I will carry on. Blood suckers for sure.

By the time you got a court date to ammend the order and add your eldest son...he'll already be 18. Not to mention you'll have to pay more $$$ to the bloodsucking lawyer.

Deal with it as best you can & move on. Divorce and custody battles suck no matter what the outcome! Trust me....sadly I know.

 

[Skywalker]

I hear you brother. Men will most likely always pay more. She did get off good to walk from a Civil Service job to be with her boyfriend. It will not be hard to show where the money goes as I do have records and buying cloths/food/dental that money would barely buy their penut butter and crackers in todays world. LOL

I wish i could have got off good as she did!!! cause i'm paying 9 a month for my 2 kids!! And i know one of the mothers is not doin right with the money at all.. but that will change real soon cause lawyer is about to ask the judge for her to start showing what she is spending the money on!! So now she will have to show proof each month

 

[VIPER]

man i always hate this topic as i was divorced as well with 2 kids. Child support varies from state to state as it isnt regulated federally. Here in iowa it is based off the difference between the 2 incomes. It is a certain percentage of the difference. Which i think is ok. Though at times i think its a bunch of bs period. I am very surprised you won full custody and even more surprised you won child support. In iowa the child support doesnt have to be proven to have been spent on the kids. If you think about it, it wouldnt be that hard to prove. Just think about the cost of living, house, utilities etc. It would be very easy to prove though i dont think any state can mandate the proof. I have a long ways to go being 15 years to go

 

[skydivr]

Yep, sounds a little blunt. It for sure isnt' about me and at 50 years old and 21 years at 100 percent faithful I'm fully aware of who it's about... my children. I have my 1st check book for the 1st time in my life as I gave it all to her and walked around with a 20 spot in my pocket as I served and traveled all over the world. She was not faithful and i cut their cords/bathed/changed diapers/feed/middle of the night feedings and took them everywhere and still continue to be the best father. Simply put, no squeezing from me at all but trying to understand what should be as if it was reversed it would be squeezed from me at about four times the amount and I'm even totally disabled. The want for nothing and it's not because of her money as I have made 90 percent of it over the last 21 years and they say thank you, yes sir, yes ma'am and have never worn wore out close and appreciate all they have as i have inbedded that into them just like it was imbedded into me. No anger at all as I pray daily and have let it go as that is why I filed. Without her money of a single penny I will raise and continue as I have for nearly 18 years and will put them through collage as well. I don't work two jobs as I'm not allowed to work at all. But I have worked a real job and paid taxes since I was 16 and worked for cash as a child before then. Not sure about the two wrongs but real sure about the one wrong that broke her vows and I never did and say that with all honesty. There savings account I have opened already has enough for their 1st major down payment on their 1st homes when they finish collage is proof it will go to them. Anyone that knows me knows I spend for my kids and they are well took care of. Hope i didn't sound to harsh myself but this is not a vengance thing... just trying to understand what is it supposed to be, nothing more! riding my busa... just a statement to let the Org know... I still have a Busa and glad that I do and not at all spitfull and the money I paid her out of pocket she will be in good shape for a long time not to mention the 900.00 plus per month for the rest of her life. She is good to go.

I am glad to hear this, Better explanation than OP. Don't blame you for being a little bitter as I would be really bitter. Hope u and ur children can move forward. Very unusual set of circumstances that you got custody; normally the momwould and youd be the one getting soaked, infidelity on her part or not. Difference must have been that she can work and u can't.

Posted via iPhone.

 

[Skywalker]

Thanks for the response and I'm at times bothered because of my medical issues and hope I have not offened anyone 1st and formost. This was pretty straight forward..... it was uncontested as she put her DAD and entire family before us and I new for approx 16 years the love was gone and suspected many times of the infidelity. I always done everything for my wife and kids and worked hard to the point of a nerveous breakdown. I new 16ish years ago that if I filed then the young age of my children would be for sure turned over to her. So, as suspected it came to a head and although I spent so many years begging for her/us to get help with doctors/church/chaplin and you name it and the answer was always there is nothing wrong... she was waiting, waiting on her part of my retirement check but I just had to ride it out and hope for the best. I suppose this is for the best as the children mean more to me then life itselfe. So, the question abou the money.... I'll let it go and never mention it again and keep moving forward. Ass always... thanks ORG family and thanks for all for your time and comments.

I am glad to hear this, Better explanation than OP. Don't blame you for being a little bitter as I would be really bitter. Hope u and ur children can move forward. Very unusual set of circumstances that you got custody; normally the momwould and youd be the one getting soaked, infidelity on her part or not. Difference must have been that she can work and u can't.

Posted via iPhone.

 

[fast08busa]

Hey be glad you are getting anything at all. My wife's ex is suppose to pay about a grand a month for 3 kids. He's a complete deadbeat and they are in court about every other month. Here in Arizona we are "suppose" to have some of the toughest laws against deadbeat dads which is a joke. He hasn't paid in almost 5 years and the judges keep letting him get off from paying. The only people it hurts is the children which is sad, it would be a different situation if he was coming to get the kids on his weekends, and was a good dad but he's not. Child support is always a difficult situation but good luck.

 

[racerV]

Hey be glad you are getting anything at all. My wife's ex is suppose to pay about a grand a month for 3 kids. He's a complete deadbeat and they are in court about every other month. Here in Arizona we are "suppose" to have some of the toughest laws against deadbeat dads which is a joke. He hasn't paid in almost 5 years and the judges keep letting him get off from paying. The only people it hurts is the children which is sad, it would be a different situation if he was coming to get the kids on his weekends, and was a good dad but he's not. Child support is always a difficult situation but good luck.

It has to be paid someday, keep that in mind. The debt NEVER goes away and if he ever wants credit, home, decent car, etc. he will have to rectify it.