We got enough people here already. Beaches are fouled, no fish, too hot, sand sucks, you don't want to come here. They are lying to you when they say its paradise....

Oh did I mention we HAVE NO TWISTIES HERE?
The only true thing about your post is the no twisties part.
Absolute torture it is here I tell ya!
In February and March I can't even enjoy the outdoor 70 degree weather because of it!