Fight of my life

[bacharles]

Sorry about the rant dude, but good luck to ya. I wish you could get full custody and she has to pay you child support...

She's a cutie!!

 

[ks-waterbug]

Some words of wisdom and comparisons...
NEVER settle for Joint custody with translation!
Joint Custody- She's Queen and your the Court Jester.
Shared Custody- She's Queen and your King much happier kingdom.
Never sacrifice on attorney's...
A few bucks saved on a so so lawyer can equate to lots of $$$ down the road! Spend the big bucks up front it'll cost you less in the long run. Don't take my advice look at the powerful, rich, and famous. They hire the best money can afford for a reason. Justice ain't cheap....

Ask for "Rights of first Refusal"; don't let the ex pawn your darling little girl off on a relative or baby-sitter when your perfectly capable of taking care of her yourself. Finally, never ever threaten the ex with a lawsuit unless you mean it. That away she'll know when you mean business.

 

[GSXRFANN]

Good luck man! She is a cutie. The courts can be a pain!

 

[TennBusa]

I do understand landmissle. I went through this last year with my ex. Luckily we both agree that we BOTH need to be as involved in his life as possible. I get to spend as much time as I need with him.

Good luck. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers dude.

 

[hillbilly]

I know what you are going through. The entire court system let me down 20 years ago by not letting me be involved in my childrens lives. The court was only interested in more money paid to the mother who was not spending it on the children and would not let me see them. The court ordered me to find a job that would provide insurance coverage for the kids [pre insurance companies having to insure dependant children] and I ended up living 100 miles away. The courts always refused to provide me visitation that I could use due to my crazy schedule.
The end result 23 years later is 2 children that dislike me and feel that I should contine to pay money even though they are adults now.
The court system failed me and the kids. Heres to hoping that your experience is better than mine.
By the way all expenses added up it cost me about 250,000 bucks.

 

[landmissle]

Thanks for the encouragement. The custody evaluator did give me some positive feedback. He said my house was one of the cleaner houses he has seen and that my daughter seemed very comfortable with me and in my house. The bad news is he thought my daughter's mom was a nice person and that her place was in order. I keep my place in order as a matter of course with few exceptions. She is basically a slob and very rarely cleans. She also has not allowed much time with my daughter. I've gone as long as five months with no over night visits with my daughter. The guy assured me this would change and that it was complete BS. So things will get better. Thanks again for the thoughts and prayers!

Time will tell. I'm pursuing primary custody.

 

[VaBusa]

I'm glad to hear the news was good...I'm one that also sees the courts really skew toward the Mom's and I'll never understand why...even worse to me is that so many Mom's "use" the kids as a way to get back at the Dad...makes no sense to me because no child should be denied access and rapport with both parents...

She's adorable! I hope you have many happy days, weeks, months and years ahead with your daughter!!!

 

[ks-waterbug]

(landmissle @ May 14 2007,09:19) Thanks for the encouragement. The custody evaluator did give me some positive feedback. He said my house was one of the cleaner houses he has seen and that my daughter seemed very comfortable with me and in my house. The bad news is he thought my daughter's mom was a nice person and that her place was in order. I keep my place in order as a matter of course with few exceptions. She is basically a slob and very rarely cleans. She also has not allowed much time with my daughter. I've gone as long as five months with no over night visits with my daughter. The guy assured me this would change and that it was complete BS. So things will get better. Thanks again for the thoughts and prayers!

Time will tell. I'm pursuing primary custody.

Try an establish early on a SET/GROUP of days each week that your with your child... I.E. Monday/Tuesday, or Wednesday/Thursday; this will make the transition to shared custody much easier! Remember, try and get this early on Even if you aren't given overnight visitations from the start. By doing this and getting your daughter everyother weekend you will eventually be able to bridge your visitation into Shared Custody!
Example of how 50/50 works; Makes life easier on the kids as they get older cause they always know what day they are where... Plus, it makes little league, brownies, and the likes easy to manage.
Week One
Her days: Monday/Tuesday,
Your days: Wednesday/Thursday, Her Weekend starting Friday and ending Monday AM.
Week Two
Her days: Monday/Tuesday, (she still has your child from previous week)
Your days: Wednesday/Thursday, Your weekend Starting Friday and ending Monday AM.
Week Three
Her days: Monday/Tuesday,
Your days: Wednesday/Thursday, Her Weekend starting Friday and ending Monday AM.
Week four
Her days: Monday/Tuesday, (she still has your child from previous week)
Your days: Wednesday/Thursday, Your weekend Starting Friday and ending Monday AM.

 

[cyclops12]

good luck mate
you have a Beautiful little girl there
it will be worth the effort and dont forget she will allways love you!!!!!
my daughter is 15 now and i aint lived with her since she was 5' i see her every weekend without fail
kids need both parents in their lifes
good luck

 

[06BUSA]

Best of luck to you.