you your old when


Donating Member
Old people have problems that you haven't even considered yet!

An 85-year-old man was requested by his doctor for a sperm count as part of
his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take this jar
home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.'

The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave
him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day.

The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, 'Well, doc, it's like
this--first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my
left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help.

She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried
with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still
nothing.' We even called up Arleen, the lady next door and she tried too,
first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezing' it
between her knees, but still nothing.'

The doctor was shocked! 'You asked your neighbor?'

The old man replied, 'Yep, none of us could get the jar open.'
One day my mother was out and my dad was in charge of me. I was maybe 2
1/2 years old and had just recovered from an accident. Someone had given
Me a little 'tea set' as a get-well gift and it was one of my favorite
Toys. Daddy was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when I
Brought Daddy a little cup of 'tea', which was just water. After several
Cups of tea and lots of praise for such yummy tea, my Mom came home. My
Dad made her wait in the living room to watch me bring him a cup of tea,
Because it was 'just the cutest thing!' My Mom waited, and sure enough,
Here I come down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy and she watches
Him drink it up. Then she says, (as only a mother would know.... :) 'Did
It ever occur to you that the only place she can reach to get water is
The toilet?'