darth frosty
Registered
Grandma's Boyfriend
A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one day. Playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting, he looked up and said, "Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend now that Grandpa went to heaven?"
Grandma replied, "Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can sit in my bedroom and watch it all day long. The religious programs make me feel good and the comedies make me laugh. I'm happy with my TV as my boyfriend." Grandma turned on the TV, and the reception was terrible. She started adjusting the knobs, trying to get the picture in focus. Frustrated, she started hitting the backside of the TV hoping to fix the problem. The little boy heard the doorbell ring, so he hurried to open the door and there stood Grandma's minister. The minister said, "Hello son, is your Grandma home?"
The little boy replied, "Yeah, she's in the bedroom bangin' her boyfriend."
The minister fainted.
Now, that is funny.....I don't care who you are!
A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for several years. One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him she was pregnant. Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child. If she stayed in Italy to raise The child, he would also
provide child support until the child turned 18.
She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born. To keep it discreet, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write
"Spaghetti" on the back. He would then arrange for child support payments to begin.
One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
"Honey," she said, "you received a very strange post card today."
"Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it," he said.
The wife watched as her husband read the card; he turned white, and fainted.
On the card was written: "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without."
A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one day. Playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting, he looked up and said, "Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend now that Grandpa went to heaven?"
Grandma replied, "Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can sit in my bedroom and watch it all day long. The religious programs make me feel good and the comedies make me laugh. I'm happy with my TV as my boyfriend." Grandma turned on the TV, and the reception was terrible. She started adjusting the knobs, trying to get the picture in focus. Frustrated, she started hitting the backside of the TV hoping to fix the problem. The little boy heard the doorbell ring, so he hurried to open the door and there stood Grandma's minister. The minister said, "Hello son, is your Grandma home?"
The little boy replied, "Yeah, she's in the bedroom bangin' her boyfriend."
The minister fainted.
Now, that is funny.....I don't care who you are!
A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for several years. One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him she was pregnant. Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child. If she stayed in Italy to raise The child, he would also
provide child support until the child turned 18.
She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born. To keep it discreet, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write
"Spaghetti" on the back. He would then arrange for child support payments to begin.
One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
"Honey," she said, "you received a very strange post card today."
"Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it," he said.
The wife watched as her husband read the card; he turned white, and fainted.
On the card was written: "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without."
