JOKES

[gcal]

What makes 100%?

Ever wonder about these people who say they are giving more the 100%?

We have all been to those meetings were someone wants more than 100%.
How about achiving 103%?
Here's a little math that might prove helpfull.

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Is repesented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

Then:

H A R D W O R K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

K N O W L E D G E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%


But,

A T T I T U D E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And,

B U L L S H I T
2+21+12+12+19++8+9+20 = 103%

So, it stands to reason that hardwork and knowledge will get you close, attitude will get you there, but bullnuts will put you over the top.

And look how far ass kissing will get you

A S S K I S S I N G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

 

[gcal]

Superman Invisibleman, and Wonder Women.



Superman is flying around and sees Wonder Women on a roof top sun bathing in her birthday suit.

Superman says to himself "I'm gone use my super human power to get me some super human p***y, super fast from Wonder Women and she wouldn't even notice".

So, he swoops down faster then a speeding bullet and nails it super fast and swoosh, he's gone and she didn't even flinch.

A few days later he meets up with the invisible man and say's "hey inviseble man guess what I used my super human power for!..."

Invisibleman interupts and says "no guess what i used my super human power for?!
I saw wonder women on a roof top and i used my invisible power to get me some and she didnt even notice.

But ever since my butt hurts really bad............


THIS JOKE IS NOT MET TO DISRESPECT ANY ONE SO IF YOUR OFFENDED, SORRY,
JUST WANTED TO MAKE YOU SMILE.

 

[justintime2]