pregnancy = get rid of your favorite toy??

[Big E]

I understand where she's coming from. Three years ago a friend of mine left behind a 1 year old and his wife after colliding head on with a car on his GSXR 750. Sad thing is that the days leading up to his death, he was getting ready to go all track instead of the streets. Becareful out there.

 

[JB Busa]

People die in all sorts of ways everyday. I see riders out every day that have a death wish. In LA rush hour traffic last week some jackass was dropping a knee at 140. Traffic was going 0-80 mph. Like others have mentioned get life insurance and keep riding. You could get some illness and die tommorow- live for today.

 

[nitrousjunkie]

Here's my 02, There is no way she's gonna change her mind on this, the more you talk about it, fight about it, discuss it,the stronger her resolve.I would get rid of the bike,the last thing you want to her to see or think is that you've chosen the bike over her and your baby,she'll resent it till you either get rid of it or get a divorce,Just not worth it man.Sell the thing, bring your new one into the world,then talk about another bike.If you seem to her that you've given up something for her,it goes along way, trust me.NJ.

 

[MET]

If she is really against the bike take a break. I did when my boys were growing up. I had a bike but took it out less. Then the boys went into dirt bikes. Then I went into bikes heavy again. You have to remember that your wife is expecting and will look at having you around for a while to bring upo the baby.

 

[HillsRider]

I must be one of the very lucky ones... I bought my busa when my wife was 4 months pregnant!! Our daughter is 4 months old now & she won't ride with me because it's uncomfortable so I get to buy a cruiser next year. Hell yes I'm keeping my busa!!

 

[Smoke_Dog]

1. Dog, Keep the bike at your friends House and go ride it when she's asleep!
2. But, on a serious note, keep the bike, and let the chips fall where they may!
3. She has to keep you anyway it goes, because gas is to high for her to leave you anyway!



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[USMCBUSA]

The best thing to do is try to tell her how much it means to you and that you have learned alot since the accident. If nothing else just tough it out until the baby is born and she calms down alittle bit.

 

[GSXTacy]

Hey 67, if you need to escape ill be in KC Monday. On Wed, dad (GSXcite) and I will be out all day and night riding. Let me know if you want hook up somewhere.

 

[schroetf]

don't sell Busa---end of story---

 

[PACIFICBUSA]

You need to stand your ground....

If the bike means that much to you, then getting rid of it will only make the relationship one-sided....on the opposite end of the spectrum.

IMHO, it sounds like she's being selfish...but again, she is also worried about you. My wifey saw what happened to me when I wrecked,and now she doesn't want me to ride anymore.

I'm not gonna stand for that.


She needs to remember that before EITHER of you came into this relationship, you were both INDIVIDUALS, with individual interests. True, when you marry her it becomes a state of compromise, but the pendulum is swinging far too much to the other side.

What does riding mean to you? Is it a big part of your life? What does it DO for you? I've had this argument with the wife several times....and each and every single time I did not budge. I will NOT give it up....end of story.


Before I met her, I was putting in mileage....tons of it. Let me put it this way:

My island is 33 miles long by 26 miles wide. The first two weeks I had the bike, I had logged in over 600 miles on it. The mileage shot up from 7.5K when it landed here to 13K in less than seven months.

All this on an island that is only 33 miles long X 26 miles wide. How much riding do you think that is?


Thing is, the mileage should have been MUCH MORE. But, she asked me to slow down a little bit....and I did. I used to ride everday...I'd take the bike to work in the morning and ride during lunch. Then get an extra ride in before I go home.


She asked me to slow down....and I did. I limited myself to rides on Sunday...and I thought it was a compromise.


As time went on....I came to realize that I gave up too much of what I loved to do...of what I WAS. And THAT is wrong....very wrong. I was no longer myself....


Never...EVER....compromise who YOU are. NEVER. You'd only be lying to yourself...and doing that will plant the seeds of discord, malcontent and resentment. You know as well as I do that the relationship will NOT last long under those circumstances.


Don't give in....unless it is what YOU want to do. Just remember that it is YOU that has the shovel my friend...you can either make level, dig yourself out, or dig yourself deeper.


Your call.



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[Busa_05]

As far as taking attention away from the baby, having other children can do that, so can having a job, or a relative with special needs.  The motorcycle only causes a problem if you have to sell it because you can't afford(money-wise) both.  Any hobby you have that your wife doesn't like or doesn't get to participate with you can cause stress.  I think she should tell you why you should get rid of it and quit using the baby as leverage.  Kids are not a bargaining chip.

JMHO

Yeah. Generally if my wife's not home, I just lock my kids in the closet while I go riding. They're usually pretty okay until I get back.

As a matter of fact, I just locked them in the closet tonight while I went out in the garage and worked on my bike.

In any case, bro, I got no advice for you. All I can tell you is I have a 4 year old, a 5 year old, and an 8 year old. Both my wife and I ride. I've been riding since before our first child and my wife just started riding. Love for your children and spending time with them is very important, but time to do things you like, especially with the stress that comes with a first child, is equally important. It appears you and your wife have differing view points on this. I have a couple of buddies who have done NOTHING in God only knows how many years because their wives will not, WILL NOT, leave the child alone. She is with them twenty four hours a day and if the man is not working, he is home, too. That's no way to be. Meeting in the middle, give and take, even debating on who's turn it is to do the dishes...all things that will or should happen, but in the end, both parties have to give a little in order to come to an understanding. My wife very rarely tells me no. Just flat out, "No!" And when she does, it is usually her good sense prevailing, but your situation sounds pretty different.

Man, bud. I really, really hope this all works out for you.

 

[shenoyp]

What's the deal??? I posted my 04 busa for sale because it has become more of a tension in our marriage now that we are expecting our first child. But my question is why?? Why is it that once a baby is involved women seem to think that your motorcycle just became the thing that is going to cause them to have to raise a child on their own?

Do you think it is just an excuse? My wife has never been huge on bikes...ever since I wrecked my very first bike...I'll admit it, I was riding out of my ability, and was not wearing gear. She showed up at the scene and she went to the hospital with me. I broke my shoulder and foot. It scarred her I think, but I also learned my lesson.

Ever since then she has not been a fan, which I understand. But why do I have to sell my bike? Since that first bike and first wreck I've gotten much more riding experience, taken the MSF course, wear full gear and have had no other major incidents. Plus that was almost five years ago. Basically, I have grown up and take riding and safety more seriously.

I guess, I'm just trying to figure out what to do. It's not as if I am wanting to scew up my marriage or cause her grief, but I don't want to sell my favorite toy. I know it's selfish, but the thing is paid for so it's not like it is a financial burden.

Any advice?

My wife was pregnant, when I put my money down for the busa... She pretty much behaved in the same way

...asked me to let go of the money if I have to but cancell the booking

...luckly I was able to explain to her that I liked motorcycles, and this is what I wanted to do. I could never convince her, but she did make a compromise for my sake and let me have the bike... on assurance to her that I'll be safe, and I will ride responsibely.

I think you should talk it over with your wife and let her know that you will be careful, and if she wants some peace of mind ... you will not ride the bike for a couple of months until she delivers the baby. You have to accept the fact that a woman goes through a lot of emotional/harmonal changes when they are pregnant.... and you asa husband, its your duty to see that you dont trouble her too much during this time

I think thats the best way to keep your bike, tell her that you wont use it for a couple of months till she delivers the baby... and then you will be extra careful once you are a proud father!!

But if it finally comes to a situation where you cannot convince your wife... then I suppose you should let go of the bike!! I do assume that for you your wife... and your child to be are more important than a motorcycle!! You can always buy a motorcycle later in life...

 

[Fire95Z28]

Not to be a jerk, but remember the Bike will always be there for ya. I would just keep riding. If any woman marriage or not told me I had to sell what I love then I would say i guess I have to sell you.

 

[not_his_busa]

First off a baby is truly a blessing but trust me (i have a 3 year old) you will need some time to yourself. Its nice to just get away even if its for 20 mins to clear your mind.
My hubby did not want me to get a bike because he was worried something would happen and he would have to raise our son alone. We talked about it, yelled some too but he knew that I was not going to give in. I promised I would be a safe rider and I am. I know bad things happen on bikes but it can happen in a car to...

You are the only one who knows if you should sell your bike. If you do sell it, do it because you want to not because you are being forced to. Trust me it will cause problems later down the road.


Brandy

 

[cjaj_70]

Keeping the bike isnt worth damaging your marriage, so my .02 is whatever it takes to make things work.

 

[FJRider]

Brandy - good for you! Glad you held your ground!

(Women Busa riders... love it! If my wifes legs were longer she'd be riding one too, instead of her Kawi Z750.)

 

[MeltDownZ]

Go get some more life insurance, $500,000 - $1,000,000. If you die in an accident it's usually doubled. However, if you get mamed, than you're wife is really screwed, no life insurance and she get's to take care of your drueling a$$ for the rest of her life. So, just as important, go get some Disability insurance.

Then, since the bike is paid for, let it sit for a while. Or, just reduce your riding for a while. You cannot ignore the hormone storm that your wife is experiencing.

If all else fails, let the bike sit. You're not making payments. Show the wifey that you're taking her concerns to heart and it will pay off in the long run.

 

[bronc3]

I'll do what I damn well please, married or not, within reason of course. A bike is well within reason if you are responsible enough to own one. My .02, sorry for any ruffled feathers.

 

[not_his_busa]

Brandy - good for you!  Glad you held your ground!  

(Women Busa riders... love it!  If my wifes legs were longer she'd be riding one too, instead of her Kawi Z750.)  

Well atleast your spouse rides with you...mine has a bike but never rides...guess it is better off i would leave him...his bike is slow...lol

Now If I could just get everyone to stop saying " Wow thats so sweet that your BF/Hubby lets you ride his busa"

 

[GSXRme]

well, you had it coming...

Problem #1 getting married
Problem #2 getting married
Problem #3 no comment