Bad fortune cookie

[AJAY]

Theme of this thread, is bad fortune cookies.

Here's one to get started.

Happiness will come in small inconsistant doses.

Please contribute your own.

 

[AJAY]

Here's another...

Cherish belongings, they are all you have.

 

[Dr E]

Remember those you upset today will be your supervisors of tomorrow.

 

[Takeuon]

Never wear your best pants
when you go to fight for freedom.

 

[Takeuon]

That wasn't really chicken you just ate

 

[Phil96]

I'm being held captive in a Chinese cookie factory!

 

[mikeu]

I'm being held captive in a Chinese cookie factory!

Too funny!!

 

[TruWrecks]

That was just too funny Phil.

 

[BusaJim08]

(blank) nothing inside. I have had 3 of these.
???
I guess I better slow down.

 

[Busaman5000]

Meow!

 

[Busaman5000]

Everybody knows you have a small penis

 

[Phil96]

I'm being held captive in a Chinese cookie factory!

Too funny!!

That was just too funny Phil.

Not original. Think I heard George Carlin say that about 30 years ago.

 

[AJAY]

You are going to die. Please pay bill first.

 

[AJAY]

Wisdom is what other people have.

 

[BUBBA]

(blank) nothing inside. I have had 3 of these.
???
I guess I better slow down.

I got one without a fortune and asked the main waiter about it and he said,
"No Fortune, Good Fortune" I laughed and then thought about the translation = "No news = Good news"

I still asked him for another one, I like a good read.
Bubba

 

[BIG GUY]

Look behind you, Red & Blue lights not good for you!

 

[Big Red]

You are going to inherit a large fortune, check your junkmail

 

[J'Man]

Many years of bad luck for anyone who read this

 

[BIG GUY]

It say "All You Can Eat," not "Eat All You Can."

 

[AJAY]

Bad tire become apparent only deep in trail braking.