Stupid Comments Heard at Work
- Thread starter Mikey D
- Start date
I'm in Information Technology...my boss gets tongue-tied in meetings and comes up with phrases like...
"It's a 2-sided knife"
"...it will exponentially double..."
He usually pulls me aside before his meetings and asks that I refrain from laughing or making comments while he's talking...it's the hardest part of my job...not laughing!?
"It's a 2-sided knife"
"...it will exponentially double..."
He usually pulls me aside before his meetings and asks that I refrain from laughing or making comments while he's talking...it's the hardest part of my job...not laughing!?
This is one that really gets me. I work in the utilities building where we produce steam and electricity for the base.
"...but that's the way we've always done it."
my usual reply is; "so, does that make it right?"
Like the Super Bowl commercials - I'm working with a bunch of monkeys.
"...but that's the way we've always done it."
my usual reply is; "so, does that make it right?"
Like the Super Bowl commercials - I'm working with a bunch of monkeys.
I'll play...
One of the dumbest comments I've heard at work lately came from a hispanic woman that was caught hauling drug money.
After pulling $34,950.00 in U.S. Currency, wrapped in plastic and duct tape out of the hollowed out intake manifold of her nice extended cab Dodge truck we had it spread out on the hood of another vehicle counting it. She looks at the money and said, "Oh my God! I didn't know that was in there!" and here's the dumb part... "What am I supposed to do with all that money now?!?".
She was promptly informed that the money AND the truck now belong to us, and that she would probably need a cab back to Texas.
Did she really think we were just gonna count the drug money and hand it back to her to do something with it?
One of the dumbest comments I've heard at work lately came from a hispanic woman that was caught hauling drug money.
After pulling $34,950.00 in U.S. Currency, wrapped in plastic and duct tape out of the hollowed out intake manifold of her nice extended cab Dodge truck we had it spread out on the hood of another vehicle counting it. She looks at the money and said, "Oh my God! I didn't know that was in there!" and here's the dumb part... "What am I supposed to do with all that money now?!?".
She was promptly informed that the money AND the truck now belong to us, and that she would probably need a cab back to Texas.
I'm in IT as well and I hear all kinds of things....lots of stupid ones but a few funny ones as well.
Stupid one: When asking the person what they did, they responded with "a coworker said that I can fix it all by running fdisk on my computer, so I did and now it just says no operating system found" .... I asked well did you do any backups, the girl says "no, he said fdisk would back it all up at the same time" ..... she got retrained and he (the one suggesting fdisk) got fired .... moral of the story, dont fug with the sr vp's secretary unles you got a good back up plan
Funniest one - "Your proctologist called, they have found your head" .... used as a email sig file by a sr director of a major paper company out west. And I'll admit, I've used it once or twice myself
Stupid one: When asking the person what they did, they responded with "a coworker said that I can fix it all by running fdisk on my computer, so I did and now it just says no operating system found" .... I asked well did you do any backups, the girl says "no, he said fdisk would back it all up at the same time" ..... she got retrained and he (the one suggesting fdisk) got fired .... moral of the story, dont fug with the sr vp's secretary unles you got a good back up plan
Funniest one - "Your proctologist called, they have found your head" .... used as a email sig file by a sr director of a major paper company out west. And I'll admit, I've used it once or twice myself
Oh, zuk reminded me of a few more...
Gal in another office stopped me one day as I was passing through...she called me over and started whispering to me so none of her coworkers could hear...she asked "Can your department see when I'm playing Solitaire?"
Another...call came in from another user; her floppy disk was stuck and she had no idea why it wouldn't pop out. One of our guys go over to help her, and bring the disk back - it had about a dozen labels stacked one on top of another...and she had no idea why it would be stuck?
Last one - call from a higher up one day... "I don't have email" ...well, he's one of those guys that we all jump for being in the position he's in, so one of our guys goes over and checks his PC. When he came back to our office, he said "did he mention that the power was out in his building?" Ummm, no, he must have forgotten that part...
The IT field is fun...
Gal in another office stopped me one day as I was passing through...she called me over and started whispering to me so none of her coworkers could hear...she asked "Can your department see when I'm playing Solitaire?"
Another...call came in from another user; her floppy disk was stuck and she had no idea why it wouldn't pop out. One of our guys go over to help her, and bring the disk back - it had about a dozen labels stacked one on top of another...and she had no idea why it would be stuck?
Last one - call from a higher up one day... "I don't have email" ...well, he's one of those guys that we all jump for being in the position he's in, so one of our guys goes over and checks his PC. When he came back to our office, he said "did he mention that the power was out in his building?" Ummm, no, he must have forgotten that part...
The IT field is fun...
I'm an Air Traffic Controller,
Coworker said, "Man, this job would be a lot easier if we didn't have to talk to airplanes!"
I laughed, but had to agree.....
Coworker said, "Man, this job would be a lot easier if we didn't have to talk to airplanes!"
I laughed, but had to agree.....
Which shows where society has gone...
Mikey D
Registered
I agree. tho I (and the rest of the class) Laughed My Ass off at that one.Which shows where society has gone...
Kevin, you're killing me!!!
Do you work here?
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vman1300
Never Forgotten
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