Here is a truth for you Michelle, you cannot I repeat CANNOT ever change anyone.
You can be an example for them to follow if they so choose, you can lead them if they wish to follow, you can help them if they wished to be helped.
But if they don’t choose to follow, they wont.
If they don’t wished to be helped, you cannot help them.
You either accept someone for the way they are, or walk away. Let them know you care, and if they ever need you, you will be there for them but then walk away.
I have cut ties with friends AND family. I have family members now that if I never saw again, who cares. That would be my extended family. My immediate family would be a little more difficult (wife, boys) fortunately I have a pretty kick a$$ wife and 3 cool boys, so I don’t have to contemplate walking away from them.
But everyone else? My mom, my dad, my sister, my brother.. I have my life, they have theirs.
I can walk away from any situation.
I did not used to be that way, ending relationships never used to be easy, but I guess after you get screwed enough times it gets easier
As far as your sister goes. Go talk to a psychologist. I think I have heard “post-partum†can last for a long time, a yea isn’t anything.
Having kids can jack you up. If you are not used to it, and you have lets say a colicky baby that never sleeps, that can push someone over the edge that is close anyway.
Lots of variables involved in something like this, too many for me to try and psychoanalyze. But lots of factors can come into play, age, internal fears of failing as a mother, lack of sleep, frustration and not understanding a baby’s needs, her own possible chemical imbalance.
My first bit of advice is have her go see someone, if she is angry all the time, have her talk to a doctor about getting something to settle her down.
serotonin in our body helps us deal with stress.
Here is a link to Lexapro web site. Lexapro is one of the current medications being used to treat depression, this web site has a FAQ you can read
http://www.lexapro.com/
Basically serotonin levels in the body can be view as type of reservoir, the more stress we experience, the more the reservoir is tapped into. If we are dealing with more stress that requires more serotonin than our body can produce, then eventually our reservoir runs dry. Once we are out of serotonin we are unable to properly deal with stress
SSRI’s (selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors) help’s increase the supply of serotonin to the brain
This is just one possible thing to look at. I am providing this as more of an example as to how this could be a medical condition that could be addressed by a doctor.
So I would first have her go seek a regular doctor and have them take it from there.
Otherwise cut the ties and move on.
Sorry you are having these problems. And I don’t mean to sound heartless.. Just I have pretty much been there and done that with family. You just have to do what you have to do for yourself, and your husband and children.
