Redneck pickup lines

[ABP]

I stole this topic from the Warrior site thought it was funny



1) Did you fart?
cuz you blew me away.

2) Are yer parents retarded?
cuz ya sure are special.

3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea ...
I can't hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card?
cuz I'd like to sign you out.

5) Is there a mirror in yer pants?
cuz I can see myself in em.

6) If you an I were Squirrels,
I'd store my nuts in yer hole.

7) You might not be the best lookin girl here, but beauty's only a
light switch away.

8) Man - "Fat Penguin!"
Woman - "WHAT?"
Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."

9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone,
but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.

10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him?
I think he went inta this cheap motel room.

11) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner.

12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin, we kin sleep til
afternoon.

and.... the best for last!

13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench,
every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.

 

[MC MUSTANG]

These are good, but they were just posted up here about a week ago...

 

[ABP]

So I guess the guy on the Warrior site might have stole them from here and then I stole them back. Sorry for the double post.

 

[motogp08]

It's alright! Slow people like me didn't see the first one! Very funny stought!

Keep up the good werk!

 

[MC MUSTANG]

(ABP @ Jan. 15 2007,15:06) So I guess the guy on the Warrior site might have stole them from here and then I stole them back. Sorry for the double post.

No, I think someone else from here took them from the warrior site as well.

 

[motogp08]

(MC MUSTANG @ Jan. 15 2007,13:07)

(ABP @ Jan. 15 2007,15:06) So I guess the guy on the Warrior site might have stole them from here and then I stole them back. Sorry for the double post.

No, I think someone else from here took them from the warrior site as well.

Okay, take a dEEEEP breath...

Repeat after me...

"Woosah," "Woosah,"

"I'm angry, it's okay, i love myself,"

Woosah."

 

 

[PDBusa]

whoosha? Verbal Judo in the house???

 

[motogp08]

(PDBusa @ Jan. 15 2007,13:53) whoosha? Verbal Judo in the house???  

Nope, you've never seen bad boys II? The psychiatrist tell's him to say whoosah. It is supposed to be a soothing technique.

Never worked for me though!

 

[BusaBret]

(MC MUSTANG @ Jan. 15 2007,13:07)

(ABP @ Jan. 15 2007,15:06) So I guess the guy on the Warrior site might have stole them from here and then I stole them back. Sorry for the double post.

No, I think someone else from here took them from the warrior site as well.

Nope I got them in an email!! Funny though ain't they???

 

[Fate]

Nice legs...what time do they open?

You've got 206 bones in your body. Want one more?

I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked

I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue

If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning

If I were you, I'd have sex with me

Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?

Baby, I'm an American Express lover. You shouldn't go home without me.

Wanna play house? You be the screen door and I'll slam you all night long

You must be a parking ticket, cause you got fine written all over you

You remind me of a compass, because I'd be lost without you.

You look a lot like my next girlfriend

Screw me if I'm wrong, but don't you want to kiss me?
Hi, I'm Bill Clinton, but you can call me Bubba!

Pardon me, I seem to have lost my phone number. Can I borrow yours?

I'm new in town, can you give me directions to your apartment?

Do you know the essential difference between sex and conversation? (She says: No) Wanna go upstairs and talk?

I know milk does a body good, but DAMN...How much have you been drinking?

If I gave you negligée for your birthday, would there be anything in it for me?

I'm writing a phone book, can I have your number?

Excuse me miss, but I've always wanted to date a supermodel

Is it hot in here, or is it just you?