Redneck Pick up lines

[BIGSMOOTHH]

Redneck Man's pick up lines
1) Did you fart?
cuz you blew me away.

2) Are yer parents retarded?
cuz ya sure are special.

3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea
I can't hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card?
cuz I'd like to sign you out.

5) Is there a mirror in yer pants?
cuz I can see myself in em.

6) If you was a tree I were a Squirrel,
I'd store my nuts in yer hole.

7) You might not be the best lookin girl here,
but beauty's only a light switch away.

8) Man - "Fat Penguin!"
Woman - "WHAT?"
Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."

9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone,
but I bet I can make yer bed- rock.

10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him?
I think he went into this cheap motel room.

11) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner.

12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin,
we kin sleep til afternoon.

and.... the best for last!

13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench,
every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.

 

[Pipefighter248]

 

[Charlesbusa]

 

[BA BUSA]

 

[Shanling]

So you think it's ok if I try some of those out for real? I think I wanna try #12 first!

 

[greyrocket]

 

[05BusaLe]

 

[Wag]

Those actually work!

--Wag--

 

[katman]

Most of these would work here in South Texas!

 

[ozz]

that last one!

 

[fstbusa]

 

[ibified]

I had a buddy in college, and for his 21st birthday (after MANY various adult beverages) we told him the secret pickup like that would ASSURE a woman went home with him. Since we were his friends and all, he, of course, believed us, so he went up to a girl and said:


























"Can I put my heat-seeking moisture missile in your seething silo?"

The responses were pretty much immediate, and pretty much what you'd expect.

 

[Shanling]

(ibified @ Mar. 26 2007,17:51) I had a buddy in college, and for his 21st birthday (after MANY various adult beverages) we told him the secret pickup like that would ASSURE a woman went home with him.  Since we were his friends and all, he, of course, believed us, so he went up to a girl and said:


























"Can I put my heat-seeking moisture missile in your seething silo?"

The responses were pretty much immediate, and pretty much what you'd expect.

That one got me laid too!!







Laid on my arse before I knew what hit me!

 

[yamahor]

I've tried some of those! Yamahor approved to get you knocked up!











Crap, knocked OUT, I meant knocked out...

 

[badassbusa03]