TallTom
Registered
After reading the thread about post count being down I thought I'd provide this true life really happening to me story about crazy as a fruit bat ex wife.
A little background:
I commute back and forth to Dallas for work. I had been working for 2 months on a meeting with state legislatures and various governing bodies that are reviewing our operations. It took months to align all the stars and the meeting was set for Oct. 26.
I was at my home here when this happened.
I got divorced 10 years ago. In the state of Fla.
At the time I offered my ex about 70% of our marital assets in exchange for no alimony. To which she agreed to and wanted an attorney to "look it over". Which turned into a 3 year brawl that resulted in her getting nothing. She was found to be lying about her income, the events that revolved around the divorce etc. Basically she pissed off the courts bad enough that they whacked her hard. So that's the history of the last time I saw her. But to say she was upset at the outcome is a very understated way of saying she was majorly pissed off at me. But that was the last I ever saw her was the day she left the courtroom.
About 2 years ago I started getting phone calls from "someone" in Louisiana. The first one was simply to confirm I was me. They hung up. About 2 weeks later I get a second call saying they knew I was harassing my ex wife. I simply chalked it up to someone drunk and mistakenly calling a wrong number, and hung up. By the 3rd call, I called the local PD that the calls were originating from. Sorry nothing we can do, it isn't a threat of violence. They began to come with more frequency and more threats that were not threats of violence. I simply hung up. Then they'd come from another number. And so it went. I simply hung up and never gave it another thought. None of them were my ex-wifes voice.
So 6:30AM on October 9th I get a doorbell ring. *Never a good sign*
It is a county sheriff serving me with an Injunction Order from my ex wife and some other person I have never heard of in my life. I accept the service, the sheriff has nothing but a job to do.
In the sworn complaint it states I have threatened to kill them both and a laundry list of other things, such as wiretapping, following, and basic harassment claims.
Now mind you I didn't know my ex lived in Louisiana. So this is all a complete crazy story being told.
Court date of the 27th of Oct.
I initially considered not going and simply letting her get the RO as I knew I was never going to be around her and would never break the restrictions being called out. Until I learn that by doing nothing, a few things would happen. I'd be charged $750 in court cost, forfeit my 2nd Amendment Rights and likely get my security clearance revoked as it shows up on Federal Databases. So I call some La attorneys and ask them my legal options. I listened to not 1 but 3 attorneys tell me that it wold be multiple thousands of $$ PER RO. I had 2 against me. I declined the kind offers of a rate reduction to $4K to handle the matter, and no matter what I had to show up anyway.
So I schedule time off for me, have a witness that can testify to my whereabouts on the dates being claimed, to schedule their time off.
I gather all the records I could to show the courts that I have not been there on the times claimed.
And I go to court on the 27th.
She shows up, sees me there and I could tell immediately started getting a panicked look about her.
Mine was the 3rd case heard that day. I got an idea of how these go by then. The judge does most of the work and asked questions as needed. My plan was to say nothing at all as the Petitioner has the burden of proof in these. The judge basically shut her down in 30 seconds of testimony. Dismissed the matter and held me there in the seat and asked that they be escorted out. She put up enough of a fuss about being removed that it took 2 Bailiffs to convince her she was leaving one way or the other. When he was sure the Bailiffs had gotten them clear, he motioned me to approach the bench. He turned off the mic as I approached.
I was certain I was somehow about to be in trouble.
Judge: Do you own a firearm?
Me: Yes I turned it in the day I was served and I have the paperwork here if you need to see it.
Judge: You need to get an RO against her the woman appears to be crazy.
Me: Your honor I have been getting calls for years that I suspect is connected and now the courts have provided her with my home address. I wasn't worried about the calls but now that the courts have helped her find me......
Judge: Interrupting me....The courts did no such thing, when she swore out the statement she knew your address to have you served at, it wasn't the courts. This is why I'm talking to you.
Me: Your honor can't you charge her with perjury and sentence her to jail to get her some mental health help?
Judge: If I did that she'd get an attorney and have it overturned or make the courts pay to have her evaluated.
Me: So you're now telling me that I have a crazy ex wife that knows where I live?
Judge: I asked you if you had a firearm, it may require you protect yourself.
Me: As long as I don't go to jail for it.
Judge: Take out an RO for additional protection. If she shows up it would be hard to convict you.
So I went to a local attorney on my way out of town. Showed him what just happened.
Attorney: *Clicking on his keyboard as we talk* She has no money, is facing eviction and he (the attorney) thinks she is simply trying to get free housing from the La Domestic Abuse Resource Center that offers free housing to the victims of Domestic Abuse. They coach them on how to fill out a complaint with the key words needed that sets off the protective housing. She didn't plan on my actually showing up that day. Assuming she'd get the RO granted by default and get free housing for the duration of that RO which likely would have been 18 months.
He didn't think she was medically crazy he just felt she was working the free housing angle.
Me: So what do I do?
Attorney: Well if you thought she was mad at you for 10 years before, if you have now taken away her hoped for free housing, she is REALLY going to be mad when she is faced with living on the streets.
Me: But what about the fact that she is probably mentally crazy?
Attorney: The only resources most states have is the prison systems. They (the crazy person) need help, often seek it out, only to learn that the only way they can get it if they don't have money, is to go to jail. So she may intentionally be trying to get incarcerated now that the housing plan fell through.
So her next move would be to try and step it up to get arrested.
Me: Oh joy.
Attorney: Or sometimes they put themselves in physical harms way by drugs, drinking etc to end their lives or at least try to end the misery somehow. They jump off bridges, jump in front of buses etc.
Me: Interrupting him....or get shot by trespassing on an ex husbands home that she is angry with.
Attorney: Yes there's that also........
So I go see what I can file against her to see if she has violated any stalking laws (calling me repeatedly, tracking down where I live, swearing out false statements.....) *sigh*. And I had to reschedule going to Dallas the is week to do this crap.
Kind of sad really. I mean I have no love lost at all for her at all, but if she is truly mentally incompetent, its sad that the options faced are so dire. She looked like hell I will say that, but she talked as if she was lucid, aware and certainly listened and responded to the judge when questioned. So she can certainly appear to be NOT crazy.
I don't want to find out one way or the other if she is crazy, but nobody bothers with how others may be affected by these type things. I asked the attorney how to recover my expenses for this stupid event. Sue her in small claims court. Meaning I'd have to do so there in La. *sigh*
So here's my options thus far:
1. If I sue her in small claims, for the amount I had to spend to come to this, it has to be in the jurisdiction that damages occurred in.
1a. If she has no money then the point of winning is mute.
2. The statutes where I reside will not allow for an Restraining Order or Harassment. It simply does not meet the requirements of the statutes.
3. I could sue her civilly for making false statements (slander) as she did say things to 3rd parties that damaged me. But again, collecting from a deadbeat is pointless.
4. Where I live has a strong Castle Doctrine and pretty straightforward trespassing laws. So far my easiest possibility is to swear out a no Trespass Order against her, and then if she shows up, I have every reason to believe I am in fear for my life and the Castle Doctrine would be in effect.
I showed HUGE restraint during the divorce. She had the shield of counsel throughout all of it. Now that we are not attached legally I can take the gloves off. She has willfully tracked me down to my residence. She is willfully causing me trouble with no provocation on my part. She has, with malice, made false claims against me. Not only in court but to outside 3rd parties.
5. I could file for RO here, even if on shaky ground. (No threats of violence have taken place), and make her and the other party that filed, go across 2 states to answer for it. If they don't show, I win by default and they get popped for legal expenses of about $900 each, plus have the RO on them.
If she is broke as they say she is, then it would be a big expense for her to get here. And I am using exactly her sworn testimony as means to get the conviction. Hence no false statements on my part. I have phone records for all the calls made to me from their location to prove she(they whoever this other person is), is harassing me. Also in those records it shows exactly when I called the local PD to complain about these calls. There will be no false statements made by me at all in any of it.
If they show up to court, it may not get granted, but they got to spend some $$ to answer for it.....and she was popped already for legal expenses on her end so that may de-motivate her enough.
Kind of sad really. I mean I have no love lost at all for her at all, but if she is truly mentally incompetent, its sad that the options faced are so dire. She looked like hell I will say that, but she talked as if she was lucid, aware and certainly listened and responded to the judge when questioned. So she can certainly appear to be NOT crazy.
I don't want to find out one way or the other if she is crazy, but nobody bothers with how others may be affected by these type things. I have just spent a chunk of $$ on this stupidity, had to reschedule a meeting that took weeks to set up, have to answer to my boss as to whether I'm the right guy for this position (he is majorly pissed, rightfully so, that I had to be the reason that our company couldn't make the meeting we set up in the first place).
And then you don't know what the next crazy act to come might be or if it will come at all. I certainly didn't expect to ever hear from her after 10 years.
My curiosity got the best of me and stupidly (to me) the courts show the address of the parties right there in the paperwork. I Google mapped her address and it was to be honest an abysmal shack. If that is what she is living in, I can see how it could drive one crazy. Whats worse is she can Google map my address and see I am living pretty well.
So as of now I have a standing No Trespass Order on her, and I have just purchased a better holster for wearing of my firearm now. While I always carry, this sort of takes it to open carry now. I would prefer to not feel like this is the best way to live day to day, but now......its my new normal for awhile. If she shows up to my house, the cops already have stated that I would have no reason to believe that she is there to invite me out for coffee and they'd expect I'd need to use deadly force if necessary. (Meaning quietly that they would make the paper help me look as good as possible if it went down that way).
Crazy people suck in more ways than I ever imagined before this.
A little background:
I commute back and forth to Dallas for work. I had been working for 2 months on a meeting with state legislatures and various governing bodies that are reviewing our operations. It took months to align all the stars and the meeting was set for Oct. 26.
I was at my home here when this happened.
I got divorced 10 years ago. In the state of Fla.
At the time I offered my ex about 70% of our marital assets in exchange for no alimony. To which she agreed to and wanted an attorney to "look it over". Which turned into a 3 year brawl that resulted in her getting nothing. She was found to be lying about her income, the events that revolved around the divorce etc. Basically she pissed off the courts bad enough that they whacked her hard. So that's the history of the last time I saw her. But to say she was upset at the outcome is a very understated way of saying she was majorly pissed off at me. But that was the last I ever saw her was the day she left the courtroom.
About 2 years ago I started getting phone calls from "someone" in Louisiana. The first one was simply to confirm I was me. They hung up. About 2 weeks later I get a second call saying they knew I was harassing my ex wife. I simply chalked it up to someone drunk and mistakenly calling a wrong number, and hung up. By the 3rd call, I called the local PD that the calls were originating from. Sorry nothing we can do, it isn't a threat of violence. They began to come with more frequency and more threats that were not threats of violence. I simply hung up. Then they'd come from another number. And so it went. I simply hung up and never gave it another thought. None of them were my ex-wifes voice.
So 6:30AM on October 9th I get a doorbell ring. *Never a good sign*
It is a county sheriff serving me with an Injunction Order from my ex wife and some other person I have never heard of in my life. I accept the service, the sheriff has nothing but a job to do.
In the sworn complaint it states I have threatened to kill them both and a laundry list of other things, such as wiretapping, following, and basic harassment claims.
Now mind you I didn't know my ex lived in Louisiana. So this is all a complete crazy story being told.
Court date of the 27th of Oct.
I initially considered not going and simply letting her get the RO as I knew I was never going to be around her and would never break the restrictions being called out. Until I learn that by doing nothing, a few things would happen. I'd be charged $750 in court cost, forfeit my 2nd Amendment Rights and likely get my security clearance revoked as it shows up on Federal Databases. So I call some La attorneys and ask them my legal options. I listened to not 1 but 3 attorneys tell me that it wold be multiple thousands of $$ PER RO. I had 2 against me. I declined the kind offers of a rate reduction to $4K to handle the matter, and no matter what I had to show up anyway.
So I schedule time off for me, have a witness that can testify to my whereabouts on the dates being claimed, to schedule their time off.
I gather all the records I could to show the courts that I have not been there on the times claimed.
And I go to court on the 27th.
She shows up, sees me there and I could tell immediately started getting a panicked look about her.
Mine was the 3rd case heard that day. I got an idea of how these go by then. The judge does most of the work and asked questions as needed. My plan was to say nothing at all as the Petitioner has the burden of proof in these. The judge basically shut her down in 30 seconds of testimony. Dismissed the matter and held me there in the seat and asked that they be escorted out. She put up enough of a fuss about being removed that it took 2 Bailiffs to convince her she was leaving one way or the other. When he was sure the Bailiffs had gotten them clear, he motioned me to approach the bench. He turned off the mic as I approached.
I was certain I was somehow about to be in trouble.
Judge: Do you own a firearm?
Me: Yes I turned it in the day I was served and I have the paperwork here if you need to see it.
Judge: You need to get an RO against her the woman appears to be crazy.
Me: Your honor I have been getting calls for years that I suspect is connected and now the courts have provided her with my home address. I wasn't worried about the calls but now that the courts have helped her find me......
Judge: Interrupting me....The courts did no such thing, when she swore out the statement she knew your address to have you served at, it wasn't the courts. This is why I'm talking to you.
Me: Your honor can't you charge her with perjury and sentence her to jail to get her some mental health help?
Judge: If I did that she'd get an attorney and have it overturned or make the courts pay to have her evaluated.
Me: So you're now telling me that I have a crazy ex wife that knows where I live?
Judge: I asked you if you had a firearm, it may require you protect yourself.
Me: As long as I don't go to jail for it.
Judge: Take out an RO for additional protection. If she shows up it would be hard to convict you.
So I went to a local attorney on my way out of town. Showed him what just happened.
Attorney: *Clicking on his keyboard as we talk* She has no money, is facing eviction and he (the attorney) thinks she is simply trying to get free housing from the La Domestic Abuse Resource Center that offers free housing to the victims of Domestic Abuse. They coach them on how to fill out a complaint with the key words needed that sets off the protective housing. She didn't plan on my actually showing up that day. Assuming she'd get the RO granted by default and get free housing for the duration of that RO which likely would have been 18 months.
He didn't think she was medically crazy he just felt she was working the free housing angle.
Me: So what do I do?
Attorney: Well if you thought she was mad at you for 10 years before, if you have now taken away her hoped for free housing, she is REALLY going to be mad when she is faced with living on the streets.
Me: But what about the fact that she is probably mentally crazy?
Attorney: The only resources most states have is the prison systems. They (the crazy person) need help, often seek it out, only to learn that the only way they can get it if they don't have money, is to go to jail. So she may intentionally be trying to get incarcerated now that the housing plan fell through.
So her next move would be to try and step it up to get arrested.
Me: Oh joy.
Attorney: Or sometimes they put themselves in physical harms way by drugs, drinking etc to end their lives or at least try to end the misery somehow. They jump off bridges, jump in front of buses etc.
Me: Interrupting him....or get shot by trespassing on an ex husbands home that she is angry with.
Attorney: Yes there's that also........
So I go see what I can file against her to see if she has violated any stalking laws (calling me repeatedly, tracking down where I live, swearing out false statements.....) *sigh*. And I had to reschedule going to Dallas the is week to do this crap.
Kind of sad really. I mean I have no love lost at all for her at all, but if she is truly mentally incompetent, its sad that the options faced are so dire. She looked like hell I will say that, but she talked as if she was lucid, aware and certainly listened and responded to the judge when questioned. So she can certainly appear to be NOT crazy.
I don't want to find out one way or the other if she is crazy, but nobody bothers with how others may be affected by these type things. I asked the attorney how to recover my expenses for this stupid event. Sue her in small claims court. Meaning I'd have to do so there in La. *sigh*
So here's my options thus far:
1. If I sue her in small claims, for the amount I had to spend to come to this, it has to be in the jurisdiction that damages occurred in.
1a. If she has no money then the point of winning is mute.
2. The statutes where I reside will not allow for an Restraining Order or Harassment. It simply does not meet the requirements of the statutes.
3. I could sue her civilly for making false statements (slander) as she did say things to 3rd parties that damaged me. But again, collecting from a deadbeat is pointless.
4. Where I live has a strong Castle Doctrine and pretty straightforward trespassing laws. So far my easiest possibility is to swear out a no Trespass Order against her, and then if she shows up, I have every reason to believe I am in fear for my life and the Castle Doctrine would be in effect.
I showed HUGE restraint during the divorce. She had the shield of counsel throughout all of it. Now that we are not attached legally I can take the gloves off. She has willfully tracked me down to my residence. She is willfully causing me trouble with no provocation on my part. She has, with malice, made false claims against me. Not only in court but to outside 3rd parties.
5. I could file for RO here, even if on shaky ground. (No threats of violence have taken place), and make her and the other party that filed, go across 2 states to answer for it. If they don't show, I win by default and they get popped for legal expenses of about $900 each, plus have the RO on them.
If she is broke as they say she is, then it would be a big expense for her to get here. And I am using exactly her sworn testimony as means to get the conviction. Hence no false statements on my part. I have phone records for all the calls made to me from their location to prove she(they whoever this other person is), is harassing me. Also in those records it shows exactly when I called the local PD to complain about these calls. There will be no false statements made by me at all in any of it.
If they show up to court, it may not get granted, but they got to spend some $$ to answer for it.....and she was popped already for legal expenses on her end so that may de-motivate her enough.
Kind of sad really. I mean I have no love lost at all for her at all, but if she is truly mentally incompetent, its sad that the options faced are so dire. She looked like hell I will say that, but she talked as if she was lucid, aware and certainly listened and responded to the judge when questioned. So she can certainly appear to be NOT crazy.
I don't want to find out one way or the other if she is crazy, but nobody bothers with how others may be affected by these type things. I have just spent a chunk of $$ on this stupidity, had to reschedule a meeting that took weeks to set up, have to answer to my boss as to whether I'm the right guy for this position (he is majorly pissed, rightfully so, that I had to be the reason that our company couldn't make the meeting we set up in the first place).
And then you don't know what the next crazy act to come might be or if it will come at all. I certainly didn't expect to ever hear from her after 10 years.
My curiosity got the best of me and stupidly (to me) the courts show the address of the parties right there in the paperwork. I Google mapped her address and it was to be honest an abysmal shack. If that is what she is living in, I can see how it could drive one crazy. Whats worse is she can Google map my address and see I am living pretty well.
So as of now I have a standing No Trespass Order on her, and I have just purchased a better holster for wearing of my firearm now. While I always carry, this sort of takes it to open carry now. I would prefer to not feel like this is the best way to live day to day, but now......its my new normal for awhile. If she shows up to my house, the cops already have stated that I would have no reason to believe that she is there to invite me out for coffee and they'd expect I'd need to use deadly force if necessary. (Meaning quietly that they would make the paper help me look as good as possible if it went down that way).
Crazy people suck in more ways than I ever imagined before this.
