Military now and then... Funnies!!




Nick7

Registered
so I just cleaned out my email in box and found this... Yeah I still had crap from 2005 in there!!

Subject: Military Then and Now
FROM 1945 TO 2005

1945 - NCO'S had a typewriter on their desks for doing daily reports.
2005- Everyone has an Internet access computer, and they wonder why no work is getting done.

1945 - We painted pictures of girls on airplanes to remind us of home.
2005 - Do it now and see what happens

1945 - If you got drunk off duty your buddies would take you back to the dorms to sleep it off.
2005 - If you get drunk they slap you in rehab and ruin your career.

1945 - You were taught to aim at your enemy and shoot him.
2005 - You spray 500 bullets into the brush, don't hit anything, and retreat because you're out of ammo.

1945 - Canteens were made of steel, and you could heat coffee or hot chocolate in them.
2005 - Canteens are made of plastic, you can't heat anything in them, and they always taste like plastic.

1945 - They collected enemy intelligence and analyzed it.
2005 - They collect your pee and analyze it.

1945 - If you didn't act right, the First Sergeant put you in the brig until you straightened up.
2005 - If you don't act right, they start a paper trail that follows you forever.

1945 - Medals were awarded to heroes who saved lives at the risk of their own.
2005 - Medals are awarded to people who work at headquarters.

1945 - You slept in barracks like a soldier.
2005 - You sleep in a dormitory like a college kid.

1945 - You ate in a mess hall, which was free, and you could have all the food you wanted.
2005 - You eat in a dining facility, every slice of bread or pad of butter costs, and you better not take too much.

1945 - We defeated powerful countries like Germany and Japan.
2005 - We fight ideological wars with no specific enemies like the war on drugs and the war on terrorism, with no victory in sight.

1945 - If you wanted beer and conversation you went to the NCO or Officer's Club.
2005 - The beer will cost you $3.50, membership is forced, and someone is watching how much you drink.

1945 - The Exchange had bargains for soldiers who didn't make much money.
2005 - You can get better and cheaper merchandise at Wal-Mart and K-Mart.

1945 - We called the enemy names like "Krauts" and "Japs" because we didn't like them.
2005 - We call the enemy the "opposing force" or "aggressor" because we don't want to offend them.

1945 - Wars were planned and run by generals with lots of important victories.
2005 - Wars are planned by politicians with lots of equivocating.

1945 - All you could think about was getting out and becoming a civilian, again.
2005 - All you can think about is getting out and becoming a civilian, again.
 

Nick7

Registered
I agree with you ranger I didnt write them they were emailed and I got a few chuckles out of them so I thought I would share.
 

Liltroy

Donating Member
Registered
I just have to make one minor correction..we no longer "retreat", we now make a "strategic withdraw":whistle: Also, its really hard to spray 500 rounds into a bush when you're only carrying 140-210 rounds at the most.:laugh:
 

vincent

What blue lights?
Donating Member
Registered
Too much of it is true, and I am still working on getting back in. Must be something worth it in there
 

him

"THE HAYABUSA STUNT GUY"
Donating Member
Registered
i got one i got one....

Shirt used to take you out back for counseling....
No if he uses the word damn or hell he has to attend sensitivity training

Parents sent kids to military to teach them discipline...
Military sends parents back to kids cause they lack discipline
 



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