Gotta love "best friends" that know how

You usually expect a good friend to give you enouragement, not to tell you there's no way you can do it. Well, I'm done with him as a "friend". Real friends encourage you, and help. "Friends" are just there to have fun for themselves.
By the way, my dream job is working with motorcycles. If I get paid to ride one, I'd be in heaven. He knows this, and he still tries to shoot my dreams down.
Ben,

Think about this deeply. He is your friend, and he just did you the best favor a friend can do. He was candid with you and showed you some perspective.

Now, you can dismiss him dramatically and cut loose the friendship OR you can use his criticism, however insensitive it was and use it to grow as a person.

What he did was to show you what you sound like with your various occasional tangents about what you plan to do and what you're gonna do and where you want to go. To him, they sound like hot air. He imparted to you that by constantly talking about things you get nothing done.

Maybe you can use this event as a catalyst to actually do something. Prove him wrong. Make him eat crow one day when you roll up on your patrol unit as he is pulling over because he was speeding and jokingly say to him, "Bet you'd never believe that I would really do this".

So Ben, what are you gonna do? Maybe keeping the guy as a friend won't be so bad unless he is constantly discouraging you. Maybe you can stay friends anyway, take the abuse and use the anger to make it happen. Then he'll have nothing to say but, yes officer.
+1 the best motivation for me has always been, "you cant do that" or "it will never work" Oh yea...

You know a real friend tends to tell you how they really see things.. It is up to you and respect that insight and then see if you can change it. He will become an even better friend if he sees this growth..

about the crashes... seems to me the same guys seem to crash repeatedly... you need to address that problem I would think..
 
Maybe he is your only truly friend...  

You do know that you are not in shape. What do you expected him to say....

Sure Ben, you can do it... If you expected your friends lie to you then you don`t need any friends.  He believed that you will kill yourself on the motorcycle, he is worried about your well been? Maybe?

The truth is that you did crashed 2 times, and your are 23, right? You could die both those time, and know what, it is always you fault when you crashed, It was you riding that bike. You overestimated your abilities, riding conditions, others motorists behavior.
You hit the gravel? You`ve been going to fast for conditions if YOU are not able to see or react on time.

Maybe I`m wrong and you are the best rider this planet known. I don`t know that. but think about it and TALK to your friend instead of walking away from him in your grief.

He maybe acted like an a$$ and din`t explained why he is CONCERNED  about you.

Don`t give up your friendship just yet. Talk to him, let him explain his concerns. If he failed doing so.. then as you said... Fug him.

If I`ve been an azz explaining my OPINION then fug me and go on with your life.
Goes along the lines of what I said.
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All pretty good responses I think. Perhaps next time you're thinking about a goal,just keep it to yourself and surprize the fug outa everyone.I have a bud who constantly goes on about goals,this and that. I guess I'm just a mean ol bastid 'cause I am tired of hearing about all of his lofty goals,and usually ask him to STFU.Could be the same with yer bud son,you may have bored him.

Maybe keep the next idea you have to yourself,then if you make it you'll feel like you've done it all on your own.If you fail,you won't have to hear all the bastids say... "I told you so".

There was the bouncer thing,the bike mechanic deal,the blah blah blah,and now its motor-cop.You change your mind about careers regularly. My advice,pick one,go do it.If you dont like it,pick another.Actually,at your age boy,I'd like to see you return to some sort of schooling.Its a great place to hide from the real world for a couple years while you mature and perhaps can make a better choice.Trade school,or perhaps a college or university degree. I can picture you playing football for some university.Awesome place to make new friends,meet some hot chicks,etc. I know money is tight,but nows the time,your still living at home.Sell all yer shid and buy a couple years of college or trade school.
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Tuff love from... DaD. (sorry I missed your call the other day boy,I was tied up with lawyer krap).
 
If that's what you end up doing, could you PM me on what the training is like. I'm thinking about doing Law enforcement, and want to know what training is like.

I want to join our local SWAT team though. I've wanted to be a cop since i was a little kid.

Rock-on bro, i hope you get the job!
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And screw the other guy, you can do whatever you put your mind to!
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Doesn't sound like a big enough deal to end a friendship. Tell him what you told us and how you're concerned about it. I think you're totally misreading him.

If I'm wrong, then maybe you're right to end the friendship but this doesn't smack of it.

Your dad is right. Get some schooling. You'll be glad you did.

--Wag--
 
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Do what you want to do. Otherwise, it's just a job. If you don't try new things or live a little, then what do you have to live for?!! Sick em Tiger!!
 
Ben, your friend was messing around.  Think about it, in the last few months you went from going to joining the military,  MMI, doing Real Estate  and now this.  There aint nothing wrong with changing things up... but, before you speak about it to your crowd, do alittle research on it to see the feasibilty of it becoming a reality.  People like to hear someone making plans, but when the direction keeps changing, peoples focus on what you want to do starts fading.

I know you Ben. Being on a bike 12hrs a day might not be the best thing for your bad back. Think about this, what if they deem that your unfit for riding and stick you in a squad car. Then your plans have changed. You don't want to give up on all the training you just went through, but your not doing what you intended to do.

If your able to make it into the police academy, i would go the military route instead.
 
I guess I'd have to see what context it was said. I know my friend and I allways throw **** at each other, but it's in jest. I know that he'll allways have my back and the same the other way around. All I can say is go for it man, nothing in this world is better then getting paid to do something you love, I myself am trying to trim off the weight and get into shape to apply for firefighting.

Even if your friend is against ya, at least ya know you have your 'Busa family in your corner cheering ya on!
 
If you do go for it , you wont get "hired on" to be a moto cop, right away anyways. Thats a special duty. All the police have to do a stint as a regular patrol/police officer before they can apply for special duty jobs. How long depends on the department. I found all this out because I to wanted to do that same thing and actually made it through the process and got hired as a Phoenix police officer. I ended up quiting for a better paying job though. Getting hired isn't real hard because most departments are in dire need. Go to this site LINK and you can gain a wealth of info from real cops and probably some from the dept you want to get on at. The process is hard but doable, Good Luck!

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Sounds like your friend was probally right. A true friend should tell you what they think and not what you want to hear.
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Maybe he is your only truly friend...  

You do know that you are not in shape. What do you expected him to say....


Don`t give up your friendship just yet. Talk to him, let him explain his concerns. If he failed doing so.. then as you said... Fug him.

If I`ve been an azz explaining my OPINION then fug me and go on with your life.
Goes along the lines of what I said.
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Vic, I don't expect them to lie to me. But Gary has been saying he's gonna have me in shape by spring (he's been helping me on my workout schedule), and then he says I won't be able to do this... even after I'm in shape. THATS what pissed me off along with saying I'm gonna wreck the first time I'm on the bike.

I do understand my goals have gone from one thing to another lately, but his have too. Shoot, he's just friggin hypocritical on a bunch of stuff. Like, for example, watching a movie, I have a tendency to quote to myself when I know the lines, he told me to stop cause he hadn't seen the movie, so I sat there and mouthed them (No sounds) at the points I liked. He got pissed again, said I was ruining the movie for him, cause it tells ya whats coming up... Kay, I stopped completely... Then, we watch Transformers, never seen it before, he basicly tells me everything coming up in each scene as serious as could be... He didn't see a problem with it.

On top of that, his goals have changed as much as mine... He's gone from wanting to be a pro snowboarder to a soldier in the army... He gets in the reserves, and he starts looking for a way out, then he wants to stay, meanwhile working in a snowboard shop repairing boards... Now he wants to fix boards for a living.... Wait, he wants to work on cars... Oh yeah, all car problems he comes to me to ask advice, then tells me I'm wrong, then it turns out to be what I've told him, and he says he knew it...

Anyway, off topic. I know I change my mind alot. Alot of the time when I post up and say this stuff to people, I'm looking for opinions on the field... Case in point, me being a Real Estate Agent. Talking to some members on here who are involved (or their spouses are) I came to the conclusion that the market is WAY down for me to try and enter. As for MMI, I didn't do that cause I don't have the money to drop 17k+ to come out to a job paying $8 an hour...Yeah... I make that at the gas station, and I have just as much fun cause I work with friends. And bouncing was only gonna be a part time deal... Unless I got a REAL good paying job at it. I know it sounds like I'm backpeddaling, but I just speak whatever I'm thinking about when it comes to this stuff. The only one so far I've gone into persuing was MMI. I almost started with Realty school, but I then learned how bad the market REALLY was, and not what my broker friend was telling me.

Sorry, ranted a bit... Okay, ALOT more than I intended... I'm not mad at yall or anything, as a matter of fact I really appreciate the input, I'm just trying to explain where I'm coming from on it
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If you do go for it , you wont get "hired on" to be a moto cop, right away anyways. Thats a special duty. All the police have to do a stint as a regular patrol/police officer before they can apply for special duty jobs. How long depends on the department. I found all this out because I to wanted to do that same thing and actually made it through the process and got hired as a Phoenix police officer. I ended up quiting for a better paying job though. Getting hired isn't real hard because most departments are in dire need. Go to this site LINK and you can gain a wealth of info from real cops and probably some from the dept you want to get on at. The process is hard but doable, Good Luck!

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Good to know. Even so, I've had the ideas of being an LEO before, and it's starting to sound better the more I think about it. I could still do the cruiser, wouldn't bother me, as I was thinking of this before without the motorcop even crossing my mind, but a bike would be an awesome goal knowing this.
 
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