Call me Grandpa-stkr00

stkr00

Slower Traffic Keep Right ! ! &#
Donating Member
Registered
I've been putting off posting this topic for about a week now. I just can't come up with the right words to express myself, so I'll just start............

Last Wednesday as I was sitting in my recliner watching the news, my daughter said her and her boyfriend needed to talk to me. (Note: This is never a good sign). I asked my wife what was going on. All she said was..."They need to tell you". Now I ask her WTF is it and how long have you known about it.

The daughter and her boyfriend come into the living room as I go to the kitchen to get some coffee. The daughter starts crying as I ask her what's going on. The she says...
"On my birthday, Nick and I had sex and I'm pregnant"

Kicker: She's 16 years old!

Lucky thing for Nick: My brain never processed any words after it heard "sex", otherwise I'd be typing this from jail with Bubba watchin over me.

The Long John Silver's sitting on the counter was suddenly flying across the kitchen...oops...did I do that? As I proceeded towards the living room, my wife jumped up and got between us. She surprises me with her bravery. She said..."Jim, it takes two". I started saying a few things I shouldn't have, and then asked Nick if he used protection (remember, I never got past "sex"), he said yes, and I said...

Well, what the hell would y'all have done if you would have gotten pregnant? The wife promptly says..."Hey dumbass, she IS pregnant". Now my brain finally registers the whole message and I'm going into shock. Nick senses the danger he's in, but makes a wise move and never says another word or movement. After a few minutes, I told Nick he needs to leave before I do something I'll regret. He was going to walk the 5 miles home, but the wife gives him a ride anyway.

Fast Forward 1 Week

I've finally calmed down. I've accepted the situation, and we've all been talking about available options, and parenting responsibilities. I made up an assignment for both of them to get them thinking about what lies ahead of them and how this is going to change their lives forever. The little SOB actually did pretty good on it. I was hoping to be able to use it against him later on.

So, I guess in about 8 months, I'll be a friggin Grand Father at 40 years old. It just ain't right.
laugh.gif


Hope everybody is having a better month than I am
cool.gif
 
Man...you are living my worst nightmare. I can't imagime going through that. I really can't believe the kid is still walking. But hey, sounds like you are handling it well. Remember, no child is unwanted.
 
Whoa. I'm not gonna try to act like this is cool, but it could be worse. At least they realize that this is not the way things are supposed to be done, at least the guy is owning up to his responsibilities and not leaving you and your daughter alone in this, and at least you didn't kill him. A good friend of mine became a grandpa at 35, I tease him all the time, but he's accepted it and settled down. The road ahead will be rough for all concerned, but your daughter needs you now more than ever. Just my .02
 
dayum....

my worst nightmare too...and I probably woulda reacted in the same way.

I'll send up some prayers, bro....
 
all i can say is....

in the words of that beloved game show host Bob Barker...

"PLEASE SPAY AND/OR NEUTER YOUR PET".


Incredible restraint. Incredible restraint. Thats what you showed.

My best wishes/condolences/glad tidings to the un-suspecting/expecting couple. Their lives are about to change...

BIGTIME. So is yers...

How do you feel about babysitting,diaper changing,loaning money,playing councillor,carrying a second mortgage,etc etc etc. (while that punk blasts another load into yer TEEN)

have you built a basement suite yet?

best get on that.... gramps. hehehehee


Just kiddin'. Not to worry, I'm sure yer future son-of-a-#####-in-law loves her... well, he did, once anyway.




Whats his name again... o ya... Nick. it might aswell be #####, or ####, Lick.... you poor bastid.
Does Vic even have a job? he does, thats great. At least his wage as a Walmart stockboy will help a little bit.


Incredible restraint. STKR JUNIOR.... Baby Keep right.

I'll donate 3 weeks pay if they call the kid...

Rubber Jr. Rubbah fer short.... or the lack there of.


hav a gooed 1...RSD.
 
Hey man God doesn't make mistakes. Two 16 yr-olds do, but not Him. Sorry for your situation. I am still laughing at RSD's comments. Once the kid gets here you and the wife will be elated, possibly overworked, but elated nonetheless.
 
Bad situation stkr, but mature behaviour on your part!! Thats a good starter...

I think the boy does love your daughter. It does take some balls to come and confess what he has done! Now the only concern would be... does he have a Job
rock.gif
Can he take care of your daughter and their child
rock.gif


I hope everything works out well for all of you bro...!!

rock.gif
 
Good job GRANDPA.....you showed a great deal of restraint in not beating the poor little bastid into a bloody pulp. There's plenty of time for that later.
wink.gif
 
I'm really sorry your daughter is starting out her adult life like this,nothing like your baby girls innocense being stolen by a younger version of ourselves! I dont think I could have been as composed as you,so my hat is off to you.As some one else has already said, she will need you more now than ever,dont start thinking about where you went wrong,I'm sure you're a good father and instilled all the right morals and values a father should. But sometimes you know what? You can lead a horse to water but you cannot make him drink! Personally, I would seriously consider some charges against this kid,doesnt matter if takes 2,you placed a certain amount of trust in this young man and he betrayed you.Talk it over with your wife and make well informed decisions and not hasty ones.Bottom line, you cant turn back the clock, consider ALL the options as you are still her father and all the best in your decision making. NJ.



<!--EDIT|nitrousjunkie
Reason for Edit: None given...|1115324900 -->
 
That's actually funny that you didn't even hear the rest of the conversation that she was "pregnant" because that is exactly where I would have checked out too. I am not looking forward to this upcoming phase of my daughters life. Oh man what a spot to be in, they have no clue regardless of how they try to prepare for it what this means. I hope you realize by now you will end up absorbing alot of responsibility too when they figure out it takes more than what they have at their age to do this. Sorry buddy, what doesn't kill you will make you stronger. Better have an AED around just in case though!
wink.gif


I had a boy call the house a few months ago for Sarah, she is 9 and in 3rd grade. I told the kid if he ever called back again he would turn up missing. I got a call from the teacher cause the kid tatled the next day and was scared. They all know me at the school because I am in there as a FF all the time and I am on the PTA. But hey, ya gotta do what ya gotta do!
smile.gif
 
I had a boy call the house a few months ago for Sarah, she is 9 and in 3rd grade. I told the kid if he ever called back again he would turn up missing. I got a call from the teacher cause the kid tatled the next day and was scared. They all know me at the school because I am in there as a FF all the time and I am on the PTA. But hey, ya gotta do what ya gotta do!
smile.gif
now that's funny....

upon reading this the third time around, bro....


I think the lil fugger is lying to ya. I don't think there's ANY way that yer girl shoulda gotten knocked <span style='font-size:17pt;line-height:100%'>IF</span> he was using protection....unless one of threethings had happened:

1) the rubber tore

2) it was a faulty lid.

3) lil bugger is spewing like 'Ol Faithful....and MAYBE, just MAYBE, it spewed out the sides.


That's all I'm thinkin. As for him doing well on that assignment about "what yer gonna do in life", I'd have asked a bit more deeper...


Like what are ya gonna do and HOW are ya gonna show me? Heck....when I was 17 I had all the right answers in the bag....my ex-girlfriend's (in highschool) mom thought I had my head on right.


Luckily for me, nothin happened. I had NO idea what "LIFE" was....and I'm still learnin about it up to now. These youngsters are exactly that.....youngsters. They don't know SHID about the really "REAL WORLD". They may think they know it, but they're not even close. They still have a lot of learning to do....
 
i havent read everyones responces, but i was wondering what is your view on the abortion pill... or an abortion for that matter... i mean.. yea.. it happened.. but atleast there is this route.

my ex's youngest sister (15) just told her (my ex) and her family that shes pregnant (5 weeks). kicker is.. the "father" is 18 and "an illegal immagrant".... me and the ex broke up as they just started dating... i KNEW i should have beat his ass the day he came to the house!! anywho, she said she was going 2 keep it and such, but after much thinking..they/she decided the pill would b best.

just kinda curious on what ur thoughts are on this subject. being 23, and single with no kids... i cant even imagine what ur feeling/going thru. i do know IF i have a daughter, im going 2 prob be the most protective 1 out there.. just cause i know there are guys like me *and the rest of us* out there.
 
all i can say is....

 in the words of that beloved game show host Bob Barker...

   "PLEASE SPAY AND/OR NEUTER YOUR PET".

 
  Incredible restraint.   Incredible restraint.  Thats what you showed.

 My best wishes/condolences/glad tidings to the un-suspecting/expecting couple.   Their lives are about to change...

  BIGTIME.     So is yers...  

  How do you feel about babysitting,diaper changing,loaning money,playing councillor,carrying a second mortgage,etc etc etc.  (while that punk blasts another load into yer TEEN)

  have you built a basement suite yet?  

  best get on that....  gramps.  hehehehee


    Just kiddin'.   Not to worry, I'm sure yer future son-of-a-#####-in-law loves her...  well, he did, once anyway.

 


  Whats his name again... o ya... Nick.    it might aswell be #####,  or ####, Lick....   you poor bastid.
   Does Vic even have a job?  he does, thats great. At least his wage as a Walmart stockboy will help a little bit.


  Incredible restraint.   STKR JUNIOR....   Baby Keep right.

     I'll donate 3 weeks pay if they call the kid...

   Rubber Jr.    Rubbah fer short....  or the lack there of.


   hav a gooed 1...RSD.
I would have expected no less from ya Rubbah Man
laugh.gif


Now...as far as the naming goes...
wow.gif
(tempting though)

Honestly...I'm glad he never made a move towards me, because I doubt that I could have "restrained" myself at all once I got started.

Have a baby free 1
biggrin.gif


Oh...No, he doesn't have a job yet
mad.gif
 
I'm really sorry your daughter is starting out her adult life like this,nothing like your baby girls innocense being stolen by a younger version of ourselves! I dont think I could have been as composed as you,so my hat is off to you.As some one else has already said, she will need you more now than ever,dont start thinking about where you went wrong,I'm sure you're a good father and instilled all the right morals and values a father should. But sometimes you know what? You can lead a horse to water but you cannot make him drink! Personally, I would seriously consider some charges against this kid,doesnt matter if takes 2,you placed a certain amount of trust in this young man and he betrayed you.Talk it over with your wife and make well informed decisions and not hasty ones.Bottom line, you cant turn back the clock, consider ALL the options as you are still her father and all the best in your decision making. NJ.
I've already gone through most of the State Statutes concerning the issues, but the one problem is that if I charge him with anything, then she gets charged too, and they'll both end up being registered sex offenders. These laws are screwed up.

I have looked very closely at the paternety issue. The burden of proof lies with the father, so he'll have to pay to have the test done if we contest it. He and his family do not have the money for. We'll see how it works out. It's up to the daughter as to whether or not she lists him.

He might surprise us and turn his life around, but we're not holding our breath. We're betting he will bail sooner or later. The only good thing about listing him as the father, is that he will then be liable for child support. I'll enjoy taking him to court for that.
 
That's actually funny that you didn't even hear the rest of the conversation that she was "pregnant" because that is exactly where I would have checked out too. I am not looking forward to this upcoming phase of my daughters life. Oh man what a spot to be in, they have no clue regardless of how they try to prepare for it what this means. I hope you realize by now you will end up absorbing alot of responsibility too when they figure out it takes more than what they have at their age to do this. Sorry buddy, what doesn't kill you will make you stronger. Better have an AED around just in case though!
wink.gif


I had a boy call the house a few months ago for Sarah, she is 9 and in 3rd grade. I told the kid if he ever called back again he would turn up missing. I got a call from the teacher cause the kid tatled the next day and was scared. They all know me at the school because I am in there as a FF all the time and I am on the PTA. But hey, ya gotta do what ya gotta do!
smile.gif
Thanks for the laughs JT2. That AED comment got me
laugh.gif


Sooner or later, Sarah will be dating...whether you know it or not. It's a very scary time when that happens. Good Luck to you with your daughter.
biggrin.gif
 
I had a boy call the house a few months ago for Sarah, she is 9 and in 3rd grade. I told the kid if he ever called back again he would turn up missing. I got a call from the teacher cause the kid tatled the next day and was scared. They all know me at the school because I am in there as a FF all the time and I am on the PTA. But hey, ya gotta do what ya gotta do!
smile.gif
now that's funny....

upon reading this the third time around, bro....


I think the lil fugger is lying to ya. I don't think there's ANY way that yer girl shoulda gotten knocked <span style='font-size:17pt;line-height:100%'>IF</span> he was using protection....unless one of threethings had happened:

1) the rubber tore

2) it was a faulty lid.

3) lil bugger is spewing like 'Ol Faithful....and MAYBE, just MAYBE, it spewed out the sides.


That's all I'm thinkin. As for him doing well on that assignment about "what yer gonna do in life", I'd have asked a bit more deeper...


Like what are ya gonna do and HOW are ya gonna show me? Heck....when I was 17 I had all the right answers in the bag....my ex-girlfriend's (in highschool) mom thought I had my head on right.


Luckily for me, nothin happened. I had NO idea what "LIFE" was....and I'm still learnin about it up to now. These youngsters are exactly that.....youngsters. They don't know SHID about the really "REAL WORLD". They may think they know it, but they're not even close. They still have a lot of learning to do....
PAC

I really didn't need those images in my head
drooling3.gif
drooling3.gif


We're full aware of how it "probably" happened. There was no protection, and the daughter wasn't taking her BC pills correctly. She originally started taking them for acne control a couple of years ago.

The assignment they did was very detailed. I figured he was to stupid to complete it, but he managed. They weren't allowed to see each other until both of them completed it. I have talked with him about what his intentions are, and what I expect from him. He knows he has a hard road ahead, and he's going to have to prove himself as a worthy father.

All we can do is wait and see how it turns out.
wow.gif
Lord help us all.

drooling3.gif
 
Hey man sorry for your troubles. I know it's tough to do now but try and concentrate on the joy your daughter brought into your life. Now think of that being done again this time with a grandchild. I know it may be too soon but try and find a positive "Dont Fault Fix". Good Luck.

wink.gif
 
Wow...what news...THAT is a nightmare for most parents. You see all that you wanted for your children slip away because WE know how hard having kids already is at a more responsible age with a marriage certificate behind you...

I wish I knew what to say...I have someone close to me that got pregnant at age 15 (no, it wasn't me...took 6 damn years for me to start a family) and opted to not keep the pregnancy...it hurt at the time to see her go through that, but the guy had no interest in her, her family wasn't prepared to help raise a child, and at just 15, her entire life was still ahead...she did what was right for her at that time, but that doesn't mean that's right for everyone. I just know that her Mom went through hell working through this, and it still haunts them to this day I think...was it the right decision, could things have worked out and they'd have this child in their lives? All "what if" questions...you have to help her decide what's best for her now AND for her future.

It sounds like you're doing exactly that...I feel for her...I was a 16 year old girl once too...didn't do everything I should have to avoid being exactly where she is...it's tough for everyone involved. Just stay the course and let her decide and/or help her prepare for life-altering events...possibly turn to Planned Parenthood or some other organization to help her better prepare. It might help for her AND him to sit with others facing this same situation, get some help and perspective.

You and your wife shouldn't have to cope with this alone...seek help...
 
Back
Top