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Thread: Solicitors

  1. #1
    Professional Pilot BUSA CRUSEN's Avatar
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    Default Solicitors

    What is it about a no soliciting sign don't people understand? I have a big sign that they have to walk right past that says NO SOLICITING.
    I had some Jehovah's Witness come yesterday and put some crap in my door when I was taking a crap and my blood started boiling when I heard something being stuck in my door. As soon as I could I grabbed their garbage went outside and started letting them know how dissatisfied I was with them. The "woman" started playing stupid saying she didn't think the no soliciting sign applied to her. I balled up the brochure and threw it at her screaming my displeasure. I hate when people pretend to act stupid and on top of that come on my property and do it. I was really laying into her and she asked me if I want her to take my house off the list for them to visit. That got another angry response (I hope she got the message).

    Just a couple minutes ago some teenage kid knocks on my door (I have a doorbell for a reason!!!!) so I go out their expecting someone I know only to find another solicitor. I said "let me direct your attention to this big sign you passed" as she was trying to give me her spiel. I cut her off and told her to get off my property (and I'm trying to be nice since she is younger). Then she starts trying to tell me that she isn't a solicitor since she is asking for donations I lose it and to her to get the .... off my property now or I'm calling the police. She decides she wants to sit there and argue with me over her not being a solicitor. So I make it plainly clear in colorful language to get off my property now or I'm calling the cops and slam the door in her face. She finally leaves.

    Next time I'm just calling the cops as soon as I see its a solicitor. I'm not trying to be a jerk either. I live in a development and get a bunch of these people every week and I'm so freaking tired of it. Just had to vent a little.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Solicitors

    want to buy a vaccuum? or donate to a road pressure washing fund ?


    j/k
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  3. #3
    Seasoned Beef


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    Default Re: Solicitors

    Dude, everyone knows ; solicitors can't read , come on mang
    Robert

  4. #4
    Chillaxin...

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    Default Re: Solicitors

    Just open the door with a gun and a big barking dog... Works for me

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Solicitors

    do what my friend did for the jahovas, open the door with fishnet shorts & lace shirt/ ask if they wanna talk about jesus

  6. #6
    Professional Pilot BUSA CRUSEN's Avatar
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    Default Re: Solicitors

    It would be nice if I could set something up where if someone rings the doorbell a giant boxing glove comes out of the wall and punches them in the face. I wouldn't mind a solicitor here and there, but I get so many where I live and since I'm home most of the time I get to meet them all. That's why I finally got the big no soliciting sign that apparently doesn't work. It just pisses me off that this is MY property and they don't want to show me any respect on my own damn property.

  7. #7
    Professional Booga Flicka

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    Default Re: Solicitors

    Quote Originally Posted by 300Busa View Post
    Just open the door with a gun and a big barking dog... Works for me
    Same here... There's something about a threatening dog and a holstered Glock. They don't have much to say after I tell them "no."
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  8. #8
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    Default Re: Solicitors

    I had a problem with that in NC. We had the Jehovahs coming around all the time in the apartments when I was in school at NCSU. One time I was in the middle of studying with a neighbor for an exam and they kept knocking on the door. I was livid and she said "just go be polite and follow along, I promise they never come back". I sorta looked at her like WTF but I played along. I went and opened the door and she came over with a big ole peanut butter jar, had messed her hair up and said "oh honey I got the peanut butter and the dog is definitely ready to go, you want to invite your friends to play with us". The older Jehovah dude was totally freaked the fudge out while the younger one was looking a bit like "wha? peanut butter and wha? The older one grabs the younger one and they left. They didnt just leave but we watched them jog out of the complex and they never came back. All the while I was crying laughing at her.

    Once I bought a house, it got really bad. New development and folks every day it seemed. I put up a sign that said solicitors would be shot then questioned. Still the door bell rang all the time. I got to the point where I would just crack the door and release the slide on my mini 14. It was out of sight and unloaded but that sound ... oh my for some reason there was never anyone on the other side of the door a few seconds later I did have a local deputy come by one day and ask if we had issues with the solicitors. Turns out a good bit of them are really casing folks places and were stealing anything/everything they could. I recall 10 gas grills were reported stolen when these new folks with dish detergent started coming around.
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  9. #9
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    Default Re: Solicitors

    Have a no soliciting sign up right on the door they stand in front of and they still ring the bell. Sometimes I act really interested in what they have to say right off the bat and then tell them to "hold on a minute, I'll be right back." and leave them standing there waiting till they finally get bored and walk away. I don't mind kids selling stuff to make a penny for school stuff or girl scouts selling their cookies.
    "There are no stupid questions, but there are a LOT of inquisitive idiots"

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Solicitors

    fence?

  11. #11
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    Default Re: Solicitors

    I think it is funny to just sit there where they can see me and not answer the door. It's funny how stupid they are and how long they will try. Or you could just answer the door with a gun pointed at their forehead.

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