Words from the Redneck Dictionary

Blanca BusaLess

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'Fascinate'

I'm on a diet on account of the fact my shirt has nine buttons and I can only fascinate !



'Mayonnaise'

(guy says to another in a bar)
Mayonnaise some fine looking women in here tonight !

(girl says to friend along side two guys above)
Mayonnaise some ugly guys in here tonight !


:laugh:
 
My wife (from IN and a neutral accent) makes fun of mine every day. I won't ever be mistaken for a Yankee that's for sure :)
 

Sensuous - Sensuous, up get me a beer!

Bard - My brother bard my pickup truck.

Hispanic - "I bet his shutter shake would go away if he managed hispanic attacks."

Incite - "He's flyin dat way!! Keep that bird incite!"

Incense - "Dang, I tell you wut. Dat Busa right dere cost me a buncha dollars incence."
:beerchug:
 
Aint (noun)
A sister of your mother or father

All (noun)
A petroleum based lubricant

Bammer (noun)
The state west of Jawjuh. The capitol is Berminhayum

Bard (verb)
Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow"

Bob War (noun)
A sharp twisted cable

Cheer (noun)
A piece of furniture to sit in

Did (adjective)
Not alive

Ear (noun)
A colorless odorless gas mostly consisting of oxygen

Far (noun)
A conflagration

Farn (adjective)
Not domestic

Gubmint (noun)
A bureaucratic institution

Haint Gonna
Won't do it

Heered
Past tense of "hear"

Heidi (noun)
Greeting

Hire Yew (noun)
How ya doin'

Jawjuh (noun)
The state north of Florida. The capitol is Lanner

Muntz (noun)
Calendar divisions

Ranch (noun)
A toll used for tight'nin bolts

Rats (noun)
Entitiled power or priviledge

Retard (verb)
To stop working

Sawed (verb)
Past tense of "saw"

Seed (verb)
Past tense of "to see"

Seent (verb)
Sawed

Skeered
Past tense of "to scare"

Skeeter (noun)
Blood-sucking flying insect

Tar (noun)
You gontta have four of these to make your car go

Thank (verb)
Ability to cognitively process

Tinsy (noun)
State North of Jawjah. Capital is Nashful

Tire (noun)
A tall building, as in the Eiffel Tire

Vittles (noun)
Food
 
Menopause when a deer stops in the middle of a open field for that perfect shot!!
 
'Fascinate'

I'm on a diet on account of the fact my shirt has nine buttons and I can only fascinate !



'Mayonnaise'

(guy says to another in a bar)
Mayonnaise some fine looking women in here tonight !

(girl says to friend along side two guys above)
Mayonnaise some ugly guys in here tonight !


:laugh:

Yo Blanca,

Jit yet?
Did you eat yet?
 
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Aint (noun)
A sister of your mother or father

All (noun)
A petroleum based lubricant

Bammer (noun)
The state west of Jawjuh. The capitol is Berminhayum

Bard (verb)
Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow"

Bob War (noun)
A sharp twisted cable

Cheer (noun)
A piece of furniture to sit in

Did (adjective)
Not alive

Ear (noun)
A colorless odorless gas mostly consisting of oxygen

Far (noun)
A conflagration

Farn (adjective)
Not domestic

Gubmint (noun)
A bureaucratic institution

Haint Gonna
Won't do it

Heered
Past tense of "hear"

Heidi (noun)
Greeting

Hire Yew (noun)
How ya doin'

Jawjuh (noun)
The state north of Florida. The capitol is Lanner

Muntz (noun)
Calendar divisions

Ranch (noun)
A toll used for tight'nin bolts

Rats (noun)
Entitiled power or priviledge

Retard (verb)
To stop working

Sawed (verb)
Past tense of "saw"

Seed (verb)
Past tense of "to see"

Seent (verb)
Sawed

Skeered
Past tense of "to scare"

Skeeter (noun)
Blood-sucking flying insect

Tar (noun)
You gontta have four of these to make your car go

Thank (verb)
Ability to cognitively process

Tinsy (noun)
State North of Jawjah. Capital is Nashful

Tire (noun)
A tall building, as in the Eiffel Tire

Vittles (noun)
Food

My entire vocabulary:thumbsup:
 
How about these Redneck medical terms...:laugh:

Benign – What you be after you be eight.

Artery – The study of learning how to paint real good.

Bacteria – Back door to cafeteria.

Barium – What doctors do when patients die.

Cesarean Section – A neighborhood in Rome.

CATscan – Searching for kitty.

Cauterize – Made eye contact with her.

Colic – A sheep dog.

Coma – A punctuation mark.

D & C – Where Washington is.

Dilate – To live long.

Enema – Not a friend.

Fester – Quicker than someone else.

Fibula – A small lie.

Genital – Non-Jewish person.

G.I. Series – World Series of military baseball.

Hangnail – What you hang your coat on.

Impotent – Distinguished, well known.

Labor Pain – Getting hurt at work.

Medical Staff – A Doctor’s cane.

Morbid – A higher offer than I bid.

Nitrates – Cheaper than day rates.

Node – I knew it.

Outpatient – A person who has fainted.

Pap Smear – A fatherhood test.

Pelvis – .Second cousin to Elvis.

Post Operative – A letter carrier.

Recovery Room – Place to do upholstery.

Rectum – Damn near killed him.

Secretion – Hiding something.

Seizure – Roman emperor.

Tablet – A small table.

Terminal Illness – Getting sick at the airport.

Tumor – More than one.

Urine – Opposite of you’re out.

Varicose – Near by/close by.
 
You're famous now Bubba!!! :whistle:

AH: The thing you see with, and the personal pronoun used denoting individuality.
Usage:"Ah think Ah've got somethin' in mah ah."

ARE: (noun) - A colorless, odorless gas containing oxygen.
Usage: "He cain't breathe ... give 'im some ARE!"

ARTERY: The Study of Paintings

AST: To interrogate or inquire, as when a revenue agent seeks information about illegal moonshine stills.
Usage:"Don't ast me so many question. It makes me mad."

ATTAIR: Contraction used to indicate a specific item of desire.
Usage:"Pass me attair gravy, please"

AWL: An amber fluid used to lubricate engines.
Usage: "I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts awl in my pickup truck."

BACKUP: What you do when you run across a skunk in the woods

BAMMER - (noun) - The state west of Jawjuh. Capitol is Berminhayam.
Usage: "A tornader jes went through Bammer an' left $20,000,000 in improvements."

BAR CODE: Them’s the fight’n rules down at the local tavern.

BARE - (noun) - An alcoholic beverage made of barley, hops, and yeast.
Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a bare."

BARIUM: What you do when CPR Fails.
Jerry Springer Show, Too hot for television, redneck TV

BAHS: - noun. A supervisor.
Usage: "If you don't stop reading these Southern words and git back to work, your bahs is gonna far you!"

BARD: - verb. Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow."
Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck."

BAWL: What water does at 212 degrees Fahrenheit.
Usage:"That gal cain't even bawl water without burnin' it."

BIT: A wager as in, "I bit you can't spit that watermelon seed across the porch longways."

BLEEVE: Expression of intent or faith.
Usage:"Ah bleeve we ought to go to church this Sunday."

BOBWAR: - noun. A sharp, twisted cable.
Usage: "Boy, stay away from that bob war fence.

BYTE: What your pit bull done to cousin Jethro

CENT: Plural of cent.
Usage:"You paid five dollars for that necktie? Ah wouldn't give fiddy cent for it."

CESEAREAN SECTION: A District in Rome

CHEER: (adverb) In this place.
Usage: "Just set that bare rat cheer".

COCA-COLA: The soft drink that started in Atlanta and conquered the world.
Usage:"Ah hear they even sell Coca-cola in Russia."

COLE'S LAW: Thinly shredded cabbage

COLIC: A sheep Dog

CYST: To render aid.
Usage:"Can Ah cyst you with those packages, ma'am."

DAYUM: A cuss word Rhett Butler used in "Gone With the Wind."
Usage:"Frankly,my dear, I don't give a dayum."

DID: - adjective. Not alive.
Usage: "He's did, Jim."

DILATE: To live long

EAR: - noun. A colorless, odorless gas (unless you are in LA).
Usage: "He can't breathe ... give 'em some ear!"

EVERWHICHWAYS: To be scattered in all directions.
Usage:"You should have been there when the train hit attair chicken truck. Them chickens flew everwhichaways.
One way, misdirection, can't go back

FAR: - noun. A conflagration.
Usage: "If my brother from Jawjuh doesn't change the all in my pickup truck, that things gonna catch far."

FARN: - adjective. Not local.
Usage: "I cudnt unnerstand a wurd he sed ... must be from some farn country."

FAT: - (noun), (verb) - A battle or combat; to engage in battle or combat.
Usage: "You younguns keep fat'n, n' ah'm gonna whup y'uh."

FESTER: Quicker
Usage: I'll bet that Leroy is Fester than you are.

FLARES: The colorful, sweet-smelling part of a plant.
Usage:"If yo wife's mad at ya, it's smart to take her some flares."

FUR: Because of or to indicate possession.
Usage:"Fur yew ta get attair new car yew gotta go see Bubba bout a loan."

GOOD OLE BOY: Any Southern male between age 16 and 60 who has an amiable disposition and is fond of boon companions, strong drink, hound dawgs, fishin', huntin', and good lookin' women, but not necessarily in that order.
Usage:"Bubba's a good ole boy."

GRIYUTS: What no Southern breakfast would be without - grits.
Usage:"Ah like griyuts with butter and sawt on'em, but Ah purely love'em with red-eye gravy."

GUBMINT - (noun) - A bureaucratic institution.
Usage: "Them gubmint boys shore is ignert."

GUMMIT: - Noun. An often-closed bureaucratic institution.
Usage: "Great ... ANOTHER gummit shutdown!

HALE: Where General Sherman is going for what he did to Etlanna. (Atlanta) Usage:"General Sherman said "War is Hale" and he made sure it was."

HAZE: - a contraction.
Usage: "Is Bubba smart?" "Nah ... haze ignert."

HEAVY DEW: - phrase. A request for action.
Usage: "Kin I heavy dew me a favor?"

HEIDI - (noun) - Greeting.

HEP: to aid or benefit.
Usage:"Ah can't hep it if Ah'm still in love with you."

HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting.
Usage: "Heidi, Hire yew?"

HOD: - adverb. Not easy.
Usage: "A broken hot is hod to fix."

HOT: - noun. A blood-pumping organ.

IDINIT: Term employed by genteel Southerners to avoid saying "Ain't".
Usage:"Mighty hot today, idinit?"

IGNERT: - adjective. Not smart. See "Auburn Alumni."
Usage: "Them N-C-TWO-A boys sure are ignert!"

IMPOTENT: Distinguished, well known.

INTERNET: Where cafeteria workers put their hair

JAWJUH: - noun. A highly flammable state just north of Florida.
Usage: "My brother from Jawjah bard my pickup truck." JEW: Did you.
"Jew want to buy attair comic book, son, or just stand there and read it here?"

JU-HERE: - a question.
Usage: "Juhere that former Dallas Cowboys' coach Jimmy Johnson recently toured the University of Alabama?"

KUMPNY: Guests. "Be home on time.
Usage:“We's havin' kumpny for supper."

LAW: Police, or as Southerners pronounce it, PO-leece.
Usage:"We better get outta here. That bartender's doen called the law."

LIKKER: Whiskey; either the amber kind bought in stores or the homemade white kind that federal authorities frown upon.
Usage:"Does he drink? Listen, he spills more likker than most people drink.'

LOT: - adjective. Luminescent.
Usage: "I dream of Jeanie in the lot-brown hair."

MASH: To press, as in the case of an elevator button.
Usage:"Want me to mash yo floor for you, Ma'am?"

MODEM: What ya did when the grass and weeds got too tall.

MORBID: A higher bid at the auction.

MOUSE PAD: Where Mickey and Minnie live

MUCHABLIJE: Thank you.
Usage:"Muchablige for the lift, mister."

MUNTS: - noun. A calendar division.
Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I aint herd from him in munts."

NAWTHUN: Anything that is not Southern.
Usage:"He is a classic product of the superior Nawthun educational system." (sarcasm)

NETWORK: Scoop’n up a big fish before it breaks the line

NODE: Was aware of; to know about something

ONLINE: Where to stay when taking the sobriety test

OVAIR: In that direction.
Usage:"Where's yo paw, son?" He's ovair, suh."

PACKET: What you do to a suitcase or Wal-Mart bag before a trip.

PHRAISIN: Very cold.
Usage:"Shut that door. It's phraisin in here."

PLUMB: Completely, Entirely.
Usage:"Ah'm plum wore out."

RATS: - noun. Entitled power or privilege.
Usage: "We Southerners are willing to fight for our rats." (Today's Southern Word comes from a school teacher in America's southern most state: Hawaii. As part of her class's study of the "War of Northern Aggression" (known to Yankees as the "Civil War"), she showed her class the movie Gettysburg. The students wondered why the Confederacy was fighting for their "rats." The answer, of course, is obvious: Southerners have very friendly rats ... in fact, you could almost say that we have some downright civil rats.)

RANCH: - noun. A tool.
Usage: "I think I left my ranch in the back of that pickup truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."

REBOOT: What you do when the first pair gets covered with barnyard stuff.

RETARD: - Verb. To stop working.
Usage: "My granpaw retard at age 65."

RETCH: To grasp for.
"The right feilder retch over into the stands and caught the ball."

SAAR: The opposite of sweet.
Usage:"These pickles Sure are saar."

SCSI: A name for 2 week old underwear.

SEED: - verb, past tense
Usage:“Deed you seed what that gurl deed to him?â€￾

SHOVELAY: A vehicle made by general motors.
"Nobody could drive a Shovelay like Junior Johnson."

SINNER: Exact middle of.
"Have you been to the new shoppin' sinner."

SQUARSH: - noun. A vegetable (also verb - to flatten).
Usage:

SUGAR: A kiss.
Usage:"Come here and give me some sugar."

TAR: - noun. A rubber wheel.
Usage: "Gee, I hope that brother of mine from Jawjuh doesn't git a flat tar in my pickup truck."

TAR ARM: A tool employed in changing wheels.
Usage:"You cain't change a tar without a tar arn."

TARRED: - adverb. Exhausted.
Usage: "I just flew in from Hot-lanta, and boy my arms are tarred."

THANK - (verb) - Cognitive process.
Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a bare."

TIRE: - noun. A tall monument.
Usage: "Lord willing and the creeks don't rise, I sure do hope to see that Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."

TUMOR: More than one

URINE: Opposite of you're out

UHMURIKA /UHMURIKIN: Someone who lives int he United States of Uhmurika. Usage:"Thomas Jefferson was a great Uhmurikin."

VARICOSE VEINS: Veins that are very close together

VIEW: - contraction: verb and pronoun.
Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City."

WAR: Metal strands attached to posts to enclose domestic animals.
Usage:"Be careful and don't get stuck on that bob war."

WARSH: - verb. To clean.
Usage: "Warsh that squarsh, Bubba ... you don't know where its been!"

WHUP: To beat or to strike.
Usage:"OOOEEE!!! Yer mama's gonna whup you fer sayin' a cuss word."

YANKEE SHOT: A Southern child's navel.
Usage:"Momma, what's this on mah belly?" "That's yo Yankee Shot."

ZAT: Is that.
Usage:"Zat yo dawg?"


:beerchug:
 
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